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Why in the fuckin' french toast is this in the goddamn funny pictures thread? All I see is text. Where the fuck did you hide the picture? Oh, what's that? You didn't post one? I see. Well, that's regrettable... Find a toilet and ********** insert your head into it. Your first post was not...

So is the 5K post t-shirt thing just a myth? I didn't get one, but other people are telling me that they did. Are they lying to me?

Reminds me of this one. :eek:

F9gRzmCf1EI

0/10 - You get nothing. You lose. Good day, sir! :hatsoff:

Brunette Gisele, along with curing cancer, would have also won Miss FO. Just sayin'. Those pictures were quite possibly the best thing since the invention of ****...

Christ, women would probably want more dialogue in their porn. Each actress would need to feel emotionally attached to the men before they had sex with them. Porno films now last eleven hours and feature deep conversations...

Confused again? You have the IQ of trout.

Excellent. Wood on a mountain was all I needed to push me over the edge. I'm a full believe in Christianity now so when does somebody explain to me how that Jesus fuck walked on water?

Dr. Evil: I don't think that's something one dude should say to another dude. Yeah. A little creepy. Mmhmm...

C'mon man! There's a goddamn apostrophe in the title of the video already. All you had to do was follow the same format. :mad: But no, you still fucking missed it. Did you do this on purpose to annoy me? I swear to Christ, I'll ***** you if you did... [/rant] Sorry, I feel very strongly about...

The only (all-natural) perfect woman I'm aware of is my wife, Sara Jean Underwood.

For fuck's sake, guys! Really? Is this amateur hour? Use the following steps: 1. Click the link - it's in blue, you can't miss it. 2. Yes, it says forbidden. But it's really not. Highlight the URL (all of it) in the address bar at the top of the page. 3. Hit enter on your keyboard. 4. Disco...

Yeah, no ****. Why is Pete the ********* in your post, man? I don't get it... :dunno:

Meh, 6/10. Pick a prettier model. And for fuck's sake, mix it up a little, man! I'm tired of looking at the same girl all the time. Just sayin'...

By the beard of Zeus, somebody get that woman a razor! :eek: Wow, that's unattractive. I like a smooth putting green. It makes it easier to sink the putt. The rest of her might be okay. I don't know. My attention is immediately drawn to old-growth forest residing below her abdomen...

^^ This. :wave2: And I probably would have advised him to plunge off of a tall bridge as well.

They left this one out. I definitely see a face in that one... :thefinger

Might check on it occasionally. Cubbies aren't on TV tonight because the Sox and Bulls are playing. So now I have to listen to them online. :mad: My Hawks already advanced, so I'm pumped for the 2nd round.

Patti Mayonaise

Why did Mel Gibson and Heath Ledger play American colonists in The Patriot?

Sports bra, much? That just looks uncomfortable...

I don't fight. I ****. So unless you want to ***** with the fishes, maybe you tone it down a little. Lest you get stabbed in the throat and fitted with some cement shoes... :hatsoff:

I'm going to hold blond Gisele hostage until somebody finds brunette Gisele (or at least posts more than one freakin' picture). That is my only demand. It is not unreasonable...

6/10. She's a little far away. Hope is a ten though...

Yeah, seeing someone get disfigured is always humorous. Her tits were probably too perfect anyway...

Yeah, I frequent Starbucks all the time. I can't get enough of the overpriced coffee and snooty liberal atmosphere. Let's all ***** caffè macchiatos and talk about the benefits of universal health care. Fuck you, Sebastian. I'll make my own goddamn coffee!

We're not the same, dear, as we used to be The seasons have changed and so have we There was little we could say and even less that we could do To stop the ice from getting thinner under me and you We buried our love in the wintry grave A lump in the snow was all that remained But we stayed by...

Don't be upset that I know more Shakespeare than you. It's all right. There, there, Sir (knighting, how quaint) Trebus...

Methink'st thou art a general offence and every man should beat thee. :hatsoff:

Give me a hot chick wearing a Chicago Cubs outfit (and don't post Next Door Nikki, I've already seen it).

Fail / 10 A link to your thread does not a signature make. :hatsoff:

We tried, but evidently we weren't completely successful. Imagine that: something else the government couldn't take care of completely...

I wouldn't pick a homeless man up off the street either. Any chance we can eliminate them as well?

Are you implying that Celine Dion doesn't resemble a domestic cow? Because if so, I'd have to beg to differ. They have nearly the same facial structure and blank stare...

So if it triples the time that I last in bed, all of the lucky women are now going to get 54 seconds of pure pleasure instead of my usual 18. Oh boy, oh boy, I'm a freakin' iron man!

Suicide is your only option. Seriously.

There was a Native American girl looking to join here earlier, but I think she ended up getting reservations somewhere else...

Suicide is your only option. Seek a tall bridge and leap off...

Purdue and Indiana. That's how you represent the Hoosier state, baby. The correlation between immodesty and earthquakes is equitable to the correlation between prematurely reading about OT III (and Xenu) and developing pneumonia. WLFI is also my local news station. Just sayin'...

It's the quicker picker upper, right? I use an industrial shop vac. It barely fits over my cock, but it cleans up the mess easier...

I don't get it. :dunno: Are we supposed to congratulate you on getting out of a prison term? You're a bane on society and you assaulted another individual because you had "beef" with him. You probably deserve to be in jail. And why are you telling us this? I thought I took my "I give a ****"...

Jo Garcia - Playboy's 2008 Cyber Girl of the Year. More:

Yep... many times.

^^ Let me set this thread straight. Brunette Gisele > Blond Gisele. Brunette Gisele cures cancer. True statement...

Empty netter, and that's all she wrote! 5-3 Hawks, baby. If we were at the UC, we'd be hearing this right now: sEXHeTcxQy4

In Niemi 's defense, two of the Preds' goals have been on redirects in front of the net. Honestly, what do you do about that? Pekka Rinne has put up a wall here in the second period, but he was way out of position on one of the Hawks' goals.

I suppose. I prefer coat hangers myself... (too far?)

Do mistakes like this give anyone else the sudden urge to punch babies? :mad:

Oh, I see how is. You're not content just hating one Chicago team, you have to go against my other one too? We're wrapping the series up tonight. Mark it down. 3-1 in the first and we had one of the weirdest goals I've ever seen. The puck caromed off of Kane's skate near center ice and caught...