Since most threads are now started/bumped by Little Red Wagon, I thought I'd create a silly thread.
- Thread starter Torre82
- Start date
Back when the little known WGN series "Salem" was airing, I recall being particularly attracted to lead actress Janet Montgomery (with whom I share an exact birthday). I often experienced maladaptive daydreams about having sexual intercourse with her. There is a season 3 episode in which her male costar gets two big handfuls of her boobs. He is squeezing the damn Charmin. I was jealous of that person. He gets to grope Janet Montgomery at work and I do not. Life is cruel.
I have devoted considerable thought to what I would do if I had to kick a person while they are peeing in order to avoid some dire consequence. I would go to a mall and target men in their late 50s. At that age, they should stout enough not to sustain injury but also be, on average, at a disadvantage in a foot race. Once they are at the urinal peeing, I would kick them, run to my car and drive away. If they want me to kick a woman I'll just pay and she'll be young and hot.
I sent an angry text about my penis to a wrong number but I didn't know it was a wrong number. Their responses were reasonable with who I thought I was texting and it was only after several messages back and forth that we realized our error. That was embarrassing. Embarrassing enough that I decided not to send the angry penis text even after confirming the correct number. So some good did come from it.
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