Since most threads are now started/bumped by Little Red Wagon, I thought I'd create a silly thread.

I can totally see this being a .. porn plot. Queue the cheesey 70s / 80s porn soundtrack, as she takes off her blouse .. and then undoes the front clasp of her bra .. and buries her patient's face in between her tits!

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I'm still too coherent. This is the problem with days when I successfully abstain because it attaches expectations to the next time I get high.
 
About four months after I had left a mall security job there was an incident in which a security guard was publicly homophobic toward a lesbian couple. I trained that guard when he was hired. Not in being homophobic. I showed him how to read the pressure gauge on the fire extinguish.
 
You taught him a skill—safety, even. But you didn’t teach his ****. That’s on him. 🛑
You can’t control what people do with what they learn. Only what you pass on. And you ****** on something useful.
 
I think there are ways in which diarrhea can be funny on a deeper philosophical level.
It's easier to clean your ass after a diarrhea ****. It might not be funny, but it's true.
 
Sometimes I will post in other threads while mentally impaired and I always try to stay on topic even if my remarks are clearly from an altered state. Though I do find the idea of arguing with management in those threads were I to stray from topic amusing because I am one of only seven people here.
 
Ugh.. This happened to a guy I know in my car club. He has a sweeeeeet .. 1999 thru 2001 Mustang Cobra. Extra body cladding; custom paint job; Kenne Bell supercharger; etc. One off-season he had some suspension work done. Like, $25K-worth, back in the 2000s. During Tech Inspection for an on-track event, the Club President saw his car .. and noted, "That car is low.." The track had a long straight that was uphill. It then had say 300 yards, until a banked turn. Well .. when they put down the asphalt, at the top of the hill, before the turn, there was a .. depression / dip. Sure enough, this guy crested the hill at 100+MPH, and when he hit the dip .. I think his oil pan plug sheared off. Out dripped the oil, hitting his heated exhaust system, and he had a smoke trail. The oil dripped until he could pit back in. Thankfully, the track had a .. sander / DPW vehicle to get it up. But, the track shut down for something like 45 minutes. And, this guy's track weekend was done.

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It is very funny when the ketchup bottle makes farting noises and I have words for anyone who says otherwise.
 
Today, I was observed to be blowing on my ice cream as if it were something I expected to be hot. I attributed it to poor ***** and declining mental faculties.

Those obviously aren't the main reason but they probably don't help either.
 
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