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Make Shit Up ABout a Place You've Never Been

In Mongolia, they settle disputes by showing their genitalia. A mediator uses their hand to determine who has the bigger and smaller genitalia. The person with the smallest genitalia is considered to have more intelligence and therefore wins the dispute. This is where the term 'feeling cocky' comes from.
 
I have heard that before entering Canada, the Royal Canadian Mounties require that all people driving into the country pull their vehicles into a drive-in theater and watch 2 hours worth of SCTV so they can learn about Canadian culture. After the viewing, the tourists are then required to pledge allegiance to Rick Moranis, before finally being allowed into the country.
 
Donald Trump is actually a myconid lifeform created via a genetic engineering experiment in a secret laboratory under the University of Pennsylvania. He's actually 93% mushroom, which totally explains the hair. To this day, however, not even the scientists who developed him know why he's quite so orange though the reigning theory is that the sperm sample that was harvested to grow Trump was obtained from a young John Boehner. There is currently no reigning theory for why Boehner is orange...
 
I have heard that before entering Canada, the Royal Canadian Mounties require that all people driving into the country pull their vehicles into a drive-in theater and watch 2 hours worth of SCTV so they can learn about Canadian culture. After the viewing, the tourists are then required to pledge allegiance to Rick Moranis, before finally being allowed into the country.

Well, when I went to Vancouver there was a particularly overzealous immigration mountie that gave me a rash of shit and grilled me for 5 straight minutes about what I was doing in the country and where I would be staying, and other such immigrationish questions. Just to lighten things up a bit, after he asked me whether the Westin Bayshore, where I was gonna take the class I was there for, was a hotel or what I told him, in a somewhat snarky manner, that I would hope that he, being a local, would be able to tell me, who had never been there before. He didn't see the humor in it, but he DID tone it down a bit after that. What a douchebag, eh?
 
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