2011 Predictions

Things will still suck and will get worse.
The rich will get richer and the poor poorer.
Rights will be wronged, but not visa versa.
(A less eloqent repeat of GregCs post)

Apocolypse now, please.
 
I predict alot of OCSMs will stop talking to us after January 2.

some ********* will get naked in Playboy.

The Chicago Cubs will not win the world series...again. (yes, I'm a cubs fan)

and somebody in some government somewhere will do something stupid, again. Next.

I'm guessing that when we get to the end of 2011, your predictions will be 100% correct! :bowdown:


Except for Keith... he cannot die. :cool:

Damn, I hope not! The only thing that keeps me going some days is the hope that I'll be able to do Jack Daniels shots with Keith before I die (or he dies). Take that away from me, and I really don't see the point of going on. :dunno:
 
--Porn will be outllawed by every country in a multi-lateral Porn Treaty signed at Camp David and drawn up by the Saudis.
--The Internet along with every other information and entertainment venue, will be taken over by Pat Robertson and the New 7 Billion Club.
--An earthquake measuring 9.6 on the Richter scale will hit Los Angeles at exactly the time and date that Cliff Robertson predicts.
--Cliff Robertson will be elected President For Life in the first ever elections held one year early.
--The "new" Evil Los Angeles, destroyed by God's fury and separated from the mainland, will become a prison for hardened criminals and pornographers from which there is no escape.
--President Robertson's rebellious ******** will run away from home and take up with the leader of Los Angeles' biggest, baddest, most pornographic gang--The Shining Penises.
--As a last desperate attempt to save his ********, President Robertson will call Arnold Schwarzenegger out of retirement at his home in Alaska to take part in a suicide raid into the besieged southern California penal colony.
--After Arnold is captured and ******** to death, the President goes with fat old Kurt Russell instead.
--Kurt saves the President's ********, but he's pissed off that he was picked second. So he uses a special uplink device created by AT&T and turns off every satellite in orbit, plunging the world back into the Stone Age.
--President Robertson is impeached and replaced by Sarah Palin.

It almost sounds like a plot to a bad but potentially hilarious movie. You didn't write a screenplay down sometime in the past and are now mad because it got rejected, did you? ;)
 
--After Arnold is captured and ******** to death, the President goes with fat old Kurt Russell instead.
--Kurt saves the President's ********, but he's pissed off that he was picked second. So he uses a special uplink device created by AT&T and turns off every satellite in orbit, plunging the world back into the Stone Age.
Yes! Snake Plissken is back in action muthafuckas! :banger:

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Here are my predictions of things that DEFINITELY will not happen in 2011:

1. The Pittsburgh Pirates defeat the Baltimore Orioles in the World Series 4-3 (Cubs fans take heart......I'm a Pirates fan!)

2. The Detroit Lions, following an undefeated season, meet up with the Cleveland Browns in the Super Bowl for the 2011 season!

3. Michael Vick is named ****'s Man of the Year!

4. The Los Angeles Clippers win the NBA Finals in a 7 game thriller against the New Jersey Nets!

5. I win over $200 million in Powerball, only to die of a MASSIVE heart ****** early the next day!

6. In a shocking twist, William Shatner and Betty White win the Grammy for Album of the Year for their compulation of duets!

7. Sarah Palin's America......The Movie wins the Oscar for Best Picture.....and Glenn Beck wins an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor for his cameo in same film!

8. Gary Bettman announces that the NHL has signed a $2 Billion, 5 year broadcast deal with ESPN/ABC!

9. Another Betty White shocker comes in July, when she and Susan Boyle pose naked for the July issue of Playboy magazine.....and the issue turns out to be the biggest seller in the history of the publication!

10. In another Playboy shocker, a sex tape is ****** of Hugh Heffner & Susan Boyle! Vivid buys the rights to it for $45 million & it goes on to sell over 100 million copies! President Obama even gives it two thumbs up!

11. Televangelist Pat Robertson is rushed to a hospital following an unfortunate incident where he mistook the crazy glue for the Vaseline while viewing the Heffner-Boyle sex tape!

12. Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh come out of the closet after being caught making out at a gay pride rally in San Francisco!

And Finally.....To Make It A Baker's Dozen:

13. Saddam Hussein is found alive and well working at a Kalamazoo, Michigan 7-11! Following this revelation, NBC signs him to a 10 year contract to replace Jay Leno as host of the Tonight Show! Jay leaves and becomes Conan O'Brien's sidekick on "Conan!"


A bonus one:

14. In a voting "glitch"......Pat Buchanan is named Miss FreeOnes 2010! The other contestants complain stating the the damned butterfly ballot must have caused it......but FreeOnes refuses to reverse the results! A wild and ******* Pat Buchanan happily accepts the award in Vegas & throws a **** and ******* filled after party following the ceremony!
 
delta white will be on the board alongwith her killergram friends. Jill Kelly probably gets back in the biz.
 
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