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The Lindsay Lohole for myself. Thank ye very little. LiLo - Sam sex tape.. LiLo Lez sex tape! Cmon, cmon!

I hear thar be a milkshake in that yard. Arr, I just might check it out. Swab yer dicks, mateys!

MOMMEEEEE! The other ******** at school say you're naked on the internet. I told them no but they just wouldnt listen. It's not true, is it?! "My dear, dear offspring.. mommy loves you so, soo much. But mommy is going to tell you something so amazingly depressing you'll probably swear off even...

You cunty old cunt! Go cunt some cunts!

Re: Attn. Your *** is an advanced search option used many times daily.

While the politicians and exec's are whining, the public at large.. ya know, that 99% of the country BESIDES them.. is right alongside Obama's sentiments. We bailed the company out, not those fucksticks at the top. Not even the guys in the middle. We're all along for the ride and every last...

Cool. Not really cool. But kinda cool. No FreeOnes points for you, Mister SpamALot!

In Soviet Russia.. chickens are fucking awesome even after death.

Nice to see a LOLMONKEE instead of LOLCATZ. Of course.. you know.. LOLcat is still watching you masturbate from that hole in the ceiling. You know that, right?

Bjork and Gulf of Abba had me chuckling nicely. N1, VeridianOrbs.

That's actually really fucking awesome. That should be legally mandatory at every 1 outta 10 pools. Any higher would make it not so funny.

Someone tell him.. he's soo... SOOOOO going to be a pornstar. The famous *bottom* Dix McTiny. My massive meat feels so sorry for him.. in honor of him, I'll dedicate my next orgasm to him. I wont think of him, nor really remember him after posting in this topic.. but one day.. he will get the...

::laughs hard:: Rep time, my friend.

Bitchy hypocrite dominatrix? ::bites lip and leaves the thread without posting my thoughts about Lady Sonia meets Sarah Palin Equals Me masturbating furiously at their feet while asking permission to cum, PLEASE MISTRESS PALIN I NEED TO CUM OTHERWISE YOU WILL GET PREGNANT AND I KNOW YOU DONT...

Re: It's Official!! YAY FOR REPEAT POSTS! Video of the birth with cheesy music and extreme closeups (courtesy of InTheCrack) plz? Megaupload, NOT rapid$hare.

::gives it some thought:: Well yes. But only because board rules prohibit many things. LOLOL I've written a few erotic texts in my time, and I've wanked to just about everything. I'm the Elton John*1 of my time*2. 1:Elton once said he fucked everything except a goat. My guess is he finally...

OMFG I need an Obama bobblehead! ::reserves a space for it at my desk IMMEDIATELY::

Some of my favorite sites.. well, most-wankable sites are purely solo. ALS scan, CD girls, IFeelMyself, etc. I like as few distractions as possible in my scene. I just cant focus on what's important IRL or porn if I see something or someone extraneous. Sometimes I wanna see penetration...

Old white guys = harmless. Let them talk about the shwartz's all they want. Now hear, hear you ladies.. stop hogging my schwanz and take turns! Excellent. Three at a time works well for me. Oop, no teeth my little lieblings. Well okay, a bit of teeth. But just finely graze it over the head...

Hey, dont knock breastfeeding! Some of us never stopped. Hey, it's free milk and she doesnt mind so long as you.. and then.. she came.. a mess.. dont tell ***.. mmm. Hentai stories weave such lovely tales, oftentimes. ::bats away a stray ******** or two that wandered into MY hentai:: AWAY! Mine...

Anyone else see a mental image of those ridge-faced bastards off star trek for a split second after saying 'Kardashian/Cardassians'?

Tie her up, set her down and put on something SHE likes. See, when common sense prevailed... ... ... sorry, lemme reword this: Have some common sense. You can buy it on eBay cheaply. Do it. Then remind yourself that porn is geared toward a male audience.. with zero production value and no...

I noticed something a few minutes ago. I tend to turn cynical (while tired - hence, a ***** **** up) and talk to myself (once again, cynics mumble to themselves oh dear gawd that boozefart was awesome. ::sniffs again:: aww fuck that is awful. mmm.) But also after a hard **** up.. when you...

::stares at those pillow covers in the background, lustily:: I really like those, in a tacky vegas way. ::looks over at my mismatched bedsheets, pillow covers and.. oh **** did I put laundry in while ***** last night?! Gawd, as if I dont have enough wrinkles to iron out on those cottony...

Havent seen this many new topics worth posting in since I started ******** last night! "OH MAN! Too many opinions to express, not enough ***! *hic*" Except.. yours stay postable when sober. Nice work.

Ahh. I see. I like the classic look, but that new car.. doesnt scream luxury so much as 'aerodynamic generic car'

Orange County. The harrowing tale of a ****** that sucks at being a ******. Until the end. After the fan broke from all the **** thrown thru it and the stains on the wall are slowly spreading. Must've been a well-hydrated crap.

The Hemingway. I carefully prepare a ***** for the start of the new day, look around to see what I need.. down it, check the stats in the mirror.. go thru a rigorous 7 point inspection... oftentimes skipping 5 or so points after I notice and contrast which anime character my hair looks like...

Re: Attn. ::is suddenly reminded and saddened:: ::then remembers preggo porn and MILFs make me happy:: A sad sad day.. so I better find some post-pregnancy porn of her babymaker and gets to wankings!

So more Evansville, less Bloomington. :shrug: Closer than I thought, still a nice lil bit of a drive. So I remember the words 'Naked' and 'Waiting'. I like those words. If I had to have a third, maybe eighth word.. "pictures" and "would like to see".

Resident KKK 5 : Viral Blaxplosions and EBONY DEATH! Seriously tho.. I noticed way too many other races when playing. Where did all these white and mexican zombies come from? I thought this was Africa. Not politically-correctica.

30-45 minutes northeast of downtown Indianapolis. So no, not quite near the 500. lol And where do you live, Miss Sherri? In the city, in the country, North, East, West.. South?

Yup. So what new thread ya gonna make next time? I like the whole death motif`. Dead dogs.. dead on arrival.. DeadOnes.com something like that.

o_O Closer than I thought. Know where Fishers Indiana is? LOL, I live on 116th street off I-69.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh ****.. ass? Asians? OMFG LOLOLOL... oh, whew.. eh.. eh...yeah. That's great. What next, someone asking for a black chick with a flat ass? Goth chicks without piercings and purple hair? Czech girls who weigh over 100 pounds? Oh well. It's perfectly human to ask for...

TEEEEE up. TEEEE up! No A when referring to a golf tee. Btw you're four NA NA NA NA's over. Depending on the verse or action scene. Asses are to black guys as tits are to white guys. Asian guys? Well sadly they dont make ********* in real life, and **** is still *******. Must really suck to...

Re: American Legion Strongly Opposed to President's Plan to Charge Wounded Heroes for Who told me? Noone. I spent my time in the U.S. Army. 91Whiskey, combat medic. Call me biased but .. dammit, if I had a dollar for every whiny bastard who wanted pills, every so-called veteran who milked the...

ooohh.. it's like an Audrey Hepburn walks into a Hot Topic store kinda avatar. Me and my pensi are intrigued.

Anus & Jerks closed yer thread. I am saddened by the lack of a place to discuss dead babies.

Re: American Legion Strongly Opposed to President's Plan to Charge Wounded Heroes for I'm actually inclined to agree with this. The VA spends massive amounts on veterans healthcare. I knew the spending was extraneous even before I met the last veteran I made friends with.. with all the vycodin...

or out of a hammock. Or in bed. At home. In the kitchen. While she's on the shitter(VULNERABLE!) While she's ******. At work. At the store. Browsing for a new bra. mmmmm. bewbies.

I've gotta say Jessica Sierra. I have no idea who she is, but she looks just trashy enough. Enough for me to entertain the thought of flirting with her famous ass and actually getting laid. I just cant imagine any of the others saying yes. Well.. maybe Carmen Electra but she's had Dennis's...

She is, isn't she? You'll find three things on this board. Fun rhetoric to argue about. Likeminded souls to share filth and stories with. Noobs. Top ten threads. Stupid questions and .. this last one is IMPORTANT: Tunsty-worthy topics. A Tunsty is a specific person, and he has a very unique...

"Leave No Penis Behind. (Unless they choose the anal orifice as a fleshlight.)" One of my best policies. I'd be proud to be in your cabinet. Ooh, Mrs Butterworth.. have you lost weight? Let's go behind that rock and get a little older... I mean boulder. I mean.. fuck.. so I like MILFs. Sue me...

Visit the Milena Velba topic. Welcome to the club. ::kicks an issue of Big, Black & Round under the bed:: Nope. Doesnt do a thing for me. Much. I mean, sometimes. But not really wank-worthy like a huge pair of milkbags. Mountains of titflesh.. shaky, jiggling boobij. ::shudders in delight::

I'd sell them to another country for an assload of cash. Buy myself a tiny house nearby, buy a handgun and plenty of ammo and start fortifying the place from the inside. The looters arent gonna shoot themselves! ... actually they might. I should be patient and create dissention in the ranks.

For all your political needs, use BAG BALM! ::walks up to a bloated windbag politican and starts slathering the **** on him:: See? It works. Slowly. or.. um.. not at all. Nevermind. I thought it was sorta funny, tho. A self-healing economy, eh? That's a tall order. I think humanity is too...

Oh really? And where are you waiting, my dear? ::places a mental bet on how many HUNDREDS of miles away you are::

I want to **** mine. Therefore I propose sending me pics of your ex-gf's, current wives.. your sisters and/or *******. In return I will masturbate and **** MILLIONS of possible ******** yet again. Just imagine them swimming around.. looking for an egg to plunder.. IN THE SEWER! GUAH HAH HEEEE...