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Are you trying to say your brush your teeth with penis on the regular while both conscious and ***********?

Looks like he's giving birth to a dead baby through his belly-button. I can see the soft, decomposing head that changes colors and is occasionally shiny.

I don't. I have but so rarely I really do not. I vote "no".

He musta been a good customer. I got fired from The Yellow Rose in Austin, Texas for using the wrong VIP's head to open the front door with after he bit a waitress buddy of mine in her butt-butt. While my GM was firing me the next day he told me, "You don't belong here. Maybe you should work at...

Being self-employed is the one job I haven't been fired from yet but life is long. Sure be embarrassing having to explain to a potential new boss the cause for my termination especially if I fired myself and can provide no argument for handing myself the sack confirming that when my most recent...

The roosters must complain somethin' awful. I've taken shits hairy and smelly enough to knock crows dead off the power lines if I have the windows open. I dated this one poor gal who lived with me in a one-bedroom apartment and we shared a bathroom together. She'd be in the living room watching...

I'm good for about 3-4 dumps a day. Sometimes I go when I don't have to go too bad but just want an excuse to play more Tetris.

Will E, here's the Johnny Mundo vs Prince Puma Iron Man Match.

I like me some Häagen-Dazs, either Rocky Road or Chocolate Chocolate Chip. I like their bars also. Häagen-Dazs; sure is good.

I've been fired more times than I can count. For various reasons most often involving ********, *****, or stealing. I got fired for being late at this one job but that was not the real reason. My manager hated me because I would emasculate him with little fella jokes in front of the gym staff...

They turned into Gummi Dinglebearies.

Got up early enough to hit my friendly, neighborhood McDonald's and got my #4 Two Sausage McMuffins w/egg Meal. I was lovin' it. Sure was good.

I really enjoyed Chappie. Very entertaining. See District 9 also if you haven't.

When I lived in Austin I would often eat breakfast at the Abbey Road on the south side. I really liked their coffee and got frequent refills. I remember the waitress saying, "All these people sippin' on their cups when you be drankin'." Great migas and pancakes in that place too.

A forgotten Bill Ward song with Ozzy on vocals.

Jeanine Pirro musta got a plastic surgery tune-up because the old hag was looking quite fuckable tonight. I wonder if she shaves her twat.

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Do you prefer a coffee refill when your cup is completely empty or would you rather have the waitress top it off whenever she passes by? For me, I wait until it's empty so I can have the exact amount of cream and sugars I want. I would guess that if you like your coffee black you would raise...

I always enjoy an excuse to post this pic.

My favorite album from 2014. boᎮ ɘvo⅃ oʜW ɘƨoʜT yoɿƚƨɘᗡ

2 eggs, 2 sausage links, 2 bacon strips, a waffle, and 2 cups of coffee w/8 sugars and 2 half 'n' half each all at The Fabulous...

Put Jenna Jameson on the $10 bill so you could hand it back to her as a sex token. Her currency continues to fall as she's soon to be lobbying for the dime.

Yeah, No likey the Charlie Hustle of Church Killers. ********* works differently on people. If I can't Dial M for ****** I usually don't have the initiative to grab the 12 gauge, put on a robe, and shuffle out the door myself. If I did I'd probably forget anyway and my conscience would remain...

I got me a crawlspace that's plenty good enough.

Looks like there's a nexus between hatred and constipation.

Caitlyn Jenner, although people might think you're a transphobe if you ask to change it or would rather have a roll of quarters instead.

http://www.people.com/article/dylann-storm-roof-charleston-church-shooting https://twitter.com/search?q=Dylann%20Roof&src=typd

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2015/06/18/police-respond-to-shooting-at-sc-church/

One, several, or all of the Colonel's 11 herbs & spices makes my diarrhea spray defy gravity. Like a 3 second **** and a 10 minute wipe and I start dabbing the back of my knees with the TP first. My dingleberries are as big as biscuits.

It'd be Midnight Express night at the Turkish bathhouse with Rifki, Hamidou, undead Super-AIDS Brad Davis, regular real-life Randy Quaid, and even Jimmy Cornette getting himself some. "I BRRRRREAK YOUR BACK, FUCK YOURRRRRR ASS, AND HUMBLE YOU OLD COUNTRY WAY, VILLIAM AYESS!"

Re: Is Donald Trump Really Running For President This Time Or Being A Chickenshit Again Afraid To Ru I smiled when I heard the Neil Young song. Cortez The Killer woulda worked also. You mentioned Dee Snider and I have a couple song recommendations for the campaign.

Off-putting is right. Let's hope the Five Guys don't plunge into your burger. I assume assari wouldn't be a fan of the place.

I dated a gal named Allison. Not the tastiest burger in town but the Slurpee machine worked pretty good. Closed one week a month and two if she could get away with it.

I'd wish for the lamp to make the genie homeless.

The Catholic Church. The ****** of ******** in conjunction with the covering up of it. IMO, I don't think they are acknowledging anything because their conscience is bothering them. The pews are practically empty and they're having to find a way to be seen as ethical and having any moral high...

Chefs, yes, but these days anyone could crawl out of the woodwork and be responsible for putting a certain amount of cock in your food. Watch everyone, even those who you might not suspect of even having a cock. People aren't necessarily afraid of cocks. They just might not care for cocks in...

You and me might not be perfect but we didn't do anything wrong here. I won't allow a corrupt organization that gives comfort to ***** rapists make me not believe in God. I shed the baggage but still am a Christian.

El Pollo Loco is probably the best place to go if you don't like cocks in your food. "As President Of El Pollo Loco, I promise we have not had cocks in our food in quite a while since we fired that Mexican."

I imagine the worst burger would be considered the Zsa Zsa Gabor of Burgers with the meat tasting like it was carved off some old crow's amputated leg. "Do'n vorry! Ve'll make more!"

A decent breakfast is always a good start even if you're avoiding work too.

Any fans of The Counter? There is one in Century City that I'm interested in trying. http://www.thecounterburger.com/