aww thanks jane that makes me feel better and you made my night :o
Suicide
- Thread starter Afficial_Nastee
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aww thanks jane that makes me feel better and you made my night :o
Depression isn't always a mental illness, or a chemical inballance.
It is very sad. Very sad. And very selfish, alot of the time. Because, more often than not, their is another way.
Before you assume that I don't know, you should ask questions. I was very depressed at one point in my life. This had to do with several things, that had piled up to become one thing. I very seriously considered killing myself. One day, I sat down and did some serious soul searching. I was an addict. It was hard, but I completely sobered up. I was on very bad terms with my family, and I turned that around. I was unhappy with my job. I quit, took some classes, and started a new job. That I hate just as much as the old one, but a new outlook is a big deal when it comes to things like that.
Depression runs in my family. My father commited suicide. But I didn't need medicine to fix myself. Just, a will to be happy.
I have had several friends who have taken their own lives. I also have a friend, who's own father killed himself like mine did, except unlike myself, he had to come home and find the body. Imagine that. A fourteen year old kid, coming home from school one day and finding his dad's brains splattered all over the garage....
I take my personal experiences to heart. Especially on this matter. Before you do something that will reverberate for years after, that will effect your loved ones and friends in a way you don't always consider, you should stop and think....
Am I just afraid of life? Of what it might take to make myself, and my world better? Can I not fight for myself? Or do I just step out, and let other's worry about it?
Like a coward.
As far as mental illness is concerned, this may fall under disease/injury. But honestly, you can still find help if you really want it.
It is very sad. Very sad. And very selfish, alot of the time. Because, more often than not, their is another way.
Before you assume that I don't know, you should ask questions. I was very depressed at one point in my life. This had to do with several things, that had piled up to become one thing. I very seriously considered killing myself. One day, I sat down and did some serious soul searching. I was an addict. It was hard, but I completely sobered up. I was on very bad terms with my family, and I turned that around. I was unhappy with my job. I quit, took some classes, and started a new job. That I hate just as much as the old one, but a new outlook is a big deal when it comes to things like that.
Depression runs in my family. My father commited suicide. But I didn't need medicine to fix myself. Just, a will to be happy.
I have had several friends who have taken their own lives. I also have a friend, who's own father killed himself like mine did, except unlike myself, he had to come home and find the body. Imagine that. A fourteen year old kid, coming home from school one day and finding his dad's brains splattered all over the garage....
I take my personal experiences to heart. Especially on this matter. Before you do something that will reverberate for years after, that will effect your loved ones and friends in a way you don't always consider, you should stop and think....
Am I just afraid of life? Of what it might take to make myself, and my world better? Can I not fight for myself? Or do I just step out, and let other's worry about it?
Like a coward.
As far as mental illness is concerned, this may fall under disease/injury. But honestly, you can still find help if you really want it.
^^^^
Now that's a better explanation :thumbsup:
Now that's a better explanation :thumbsup:
I don't like to talk about my dad.
I never knew him very well. But when he took his life, it put a HUGE burden on my shoulders. I had known beforehand that he was depressed, and I was also aware of my own depression (though at the time, it hadn't come to climax) When he killed himself, I was sixteen, and all I could think about was how everyone- especially my mother but also family members that knew him- would fondly, or jokingly say that I was just SO MUCH like him. In looks and in mannerism.
That scared the fuck out of me. Because after he killed himself, those little silly remarks started to sound sort of... ominous. In retrospect, it was silly of me to worry about it, and a testemant to how I was so deluded by my own selfish perspective on life. (wah, wah, nothing's going right for ME)
Since I never really bonded with my dad, I didn't think he mattered to me. After he was gone, he finally had an effect in my life. Go figure, it was a negative one. In HS i began experimenting with drugs. It started out innocently, with weed and booze. But it turned into pain pills, coke and especially ecstacy. When you've been rolling for two weeks straight, you know what it's like to be at the bottom. Because not only are you not in your right mind; not only do you become dehydrated and extremely moody... well, I'm not sure any you have tried ex before, but when you're rolling it's almost impossible to get to sleep. Your mind is on overtime, and your body is overstimulated. I wasn't sleeping for *weeks* at a time. My body was falling apart.
Addiction is a snake-in-the-grass bastard, because you never see it coming. Sobering up is a challange like no other I have ever known. Not only do you WANT and WANT and WANT, you go through withdrawel. You get sick. You ache. Often, you hullucinate, though I never experienced that myself. But I quit, and quit everything. Even cigs.
After I was sober, I found that I had nothing to do with the time. I mean, before I would have been high. So that was another, sort of minor annoyance. So I filled it with music. I learned to play the guitar, and the Keys. I also met a girl, and I owe her my life. Because she loved me, and she supported me UNCONDITIONALLY.
It was alot to do with spare time, my depression. Boredom. I realize that, sober. After I started doing things that made me happy, becoming CONTENT with my life... just happened.
I really did come very close to ending my life, I even knew how I would do it. I wasn't one of those people going around and telling everyone I know "I'm going to kill myself". No one else knew. Not even my best friends. Looking back... How could they have ever forgiven me. My mother would have been hysterical. It would have ruined her life. Its as simple as that. I would have been killing my mother, in effect, along with myself. The rest of my family would have been crushed. All my friends... all because I WASN'T HAPPY? Are you kidding me?
So just... think about it.
I never knew him very well. But when he took his life, it put a HUGE burden on my shoulders. I had known beforehand that he was depressed, and I was also aware of my own depression (though at the time, it hadn't come to climax) When he killed himself, I was sixteen, and all I could think about was how everyone- especially my mother but also family members that knew him- would fondly, or jokingly say that I was just SO MUCH like him. In looks and in mannerism.
That scared the fuck out of me. Because after he killed himself, those little silly remarks started to sound sort of... ominous. In retrospect, it was silly of me to worry about it, and a testemant to how I was so deluded by my own selfish perspective on life. (wah, wah, nothing's going right for ME)
Since I never really bonded with my dad, I didn't think he mattered to me. After he was gone, he finally had an effect in my life. Go figure, it was a negative one. In HS i began experimenting with drugs. It started out innocently, with weed and booze. But it turned into pain pills, coke and especially ecstacy. When you've been rolling for two weeks straight, you know what it's like to be at the bottom. Because not only are you not in your right mind; not only do you become dehydrated and extremely moody... well, I'm not sure any you have tried ex before, but when you're rolling it's almost impossible to get to sleep. Your mind is on overtime, and your body is overstimulated. I wasn't sleeping for *weeks* at a time. My body was falling apart.
Addiction is a snake-in-the-grass bastard, because you never see it coming. Sobering up is a challange like no other I have ever known. Not only do you WANT and WANT and WANT, you go through withdrawel. You get sick. You ache. Often, you hullucinate, though I never experienced that myself. But I quit, and quit everything. Even cigs.
After I was sober, I found that I had nothing to do with the time. I mean, before I would have been high. So that was another, sort of minor annoyance. So I filled it with music. I learned to play the guitar, and the Keys. I also met a girl, and I owe her my life. Because she loved me, and she supported me UNCONDITIONALLY.
It was alot to do with spare time, my depression. Boredom. I realize that, sober. After I started doing things that made me happy, becoming CONTENT with my life... just happened.
I really did come very close to ending my life, I even knew how I would do it. I wasn't one of those people going around and telling everyone I know "I'm going to kill myself". No one else knew. Not even my best friends. Looking back... How could they have ever forgiven me. My mother would have been hysterical. It would have ruined her life. Its as simple as that. I would have been killing my mother, in effect, along with myself. The rest of my family would have been crushed. All my friends... all because I WASN'T HAPPY? Are you kidding me?
So just... think about it.
Skyraider22
The One and Only Big Daddy
Well i have not tried it but it has been times where I was like what is the point of life but at that time I was mad at the world.
now days when i get sad or upset i sit down and think some where some one is worse off then you be greatful with what i have suck it up and tough it out.
i have found life is worth living it is a beautiful thing when see out of the eyes of some one who isnt depressed anymore
i have found life is worth living it is a beautiful thing when see out of the eyes of some one who isnt depressed anymore
Aye, I have had suscidal thoughts.
And yes, I have acted on it.
I had a stroke at 15 and Viral Megitious, then Gull Stones and Chronic pain. Pretty depressing time. I tried to OD on meds on my 21st birthay.
And yes I agree, those who want to commit suscide DO succeed. Those who don't, want a soultion or some sort of attention.
For me, I wouldn't suggest it ever but it is when I finally got taken serious and put on medication that took away all my pain, and after seeing a Chronic pain specialist, no longer need meds to feel perfectly fine.
www.destinydarlinglive.com
And yes, I have acted on it.
I had a stroke at 15 and Viral Megitious, then Gull Stones and Chronic pain. Pretty depressing time. I tried to OD on meds on my 21st birthay.
And yes I agree, those who want to commit suscide DO succeed. Those who don't, want a soultion or some sort of attention.
For me, I wouldn't suggest it ever but it is when I finally got taken serious and put on medication that took away all my pain, and after seeing a Chronic pain specialist, no longer need meds to feel perfectly fine.
www.destinydarlinglive.com
im sorry to hear about that destiny im gald you ok and with us now the world would of missed out on someone very specail
I agree with you about addiction. You don't see it coming. My parents never started their Coke addiction until hey hit their 40's. I never saw it coming.
Same here. Actually I am right now.
And that's the thing , you gotta learn to focus your sadness and agression on the right things (go to the gym , have a fuck, watch a movie , go sit in a room and listen to some music , read a book , go run for a while etc. etc.) and to not grab a gun or a knive to harm somebody else or yourself or whateva.... But that's easier said than done....
What? Not if you're not crazy. Watching a movie, or popping in a CD seems a lot easier than jamming a knife into your body.
Get the bad feelings out, is what I'm saying. Write, or talk to someone. Get into MAKING art or music, because nothing helps you to vent like screaming your problems in a song, or posting them up for hundreds of people to read and relate with you.
If you don't even try just because it seems like it'll take too much effort, you have issues with your health, and in all seriousness, you need to go to the doctor and tell him about your problems.
Get the bad feelings out, is what I'm saying. Write, or talk to someone. Get into MAKING art or music, because nothing helps you to vent like screaming your problems in a song, or posting them up for hundreds of people to read and relate with you.
If you don't even try just because it seems like it'll take too much effort, you have issues with your health, and in all seriousness, you need to go to the doctor and tell him about your problems.
LOL. White killed that track. Just look at the comments section there. To each his own. I personally like http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FujxM71Hc3c . But there are so many more. Prince - sometimes it snows in april . Notorious BIG - suicidal thoughts . Rolling Stones - out of tears. Radiohead - Motion Picture soundtrack. ...Just too many to mention off the top of my head. :helpme:
ChefChiTown
The secret ingredient? MY BALLS
Most people who are willing to pull the trigger while the gun is lying on their temple usually don't want or care about help.
Suicide is for cowards? I don't think you realize how hard it is to try and take a life, especially when it's your own. A lot of people who commit suicide don't do it because they are cowardly. They do it because they've already tried everything that they could think of in order to make their life a better one; to put a smile on their face. Since nothing works, those people don't care about living, so they kill themselves.
It's not just an issue of "Aww, man...I don't feel like trying to get happy so I'll just kill myself". It's an issue of having an uncontrollable feeling and belief that your life will never get better, no matter how hard you try.
awww shucks you made me blush :o
If you are having these thoughts you need to talk to some one trust and figure out if it is a life event that you can work through or if you a biochemical problem that would need medication to treat.
I would be very careful. I wish you the best and hope you find a solution ease these thoughts.
I would be very careful. I wish you the best and hope you find a solution ease these thoughts.
I've had suicidal thoughts before, but I didn't contemplate them for a long period of time. I really only had them after something shitty had happened to me (socially embarrassed, life not going in a good direction, etc.). The one thing that would keep me from committing suicide and rid my mind of suicidal thoughts, was that I didn't want my father to bury his own son. I don't think any parent should have to, and giving my position where my life is nowhere near as crappy as some people's (terminally ill, disabled people, etc.), it would be really selfish of me to carry out such an act.
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