I think I'm depressed...

[10000Days]

The girl I wanted to marry broke up with me (long story) and I thought my life was over. So, I drifted into this weird state of mind that made me not care about anything. All I did was get up, go to work, come home and loaf around. I didn't do anything, unless it involved drinking and getting drunk in order to help me forget...it didn't work.



I tried to kill myself by slitting my wrists. The second that I pierced my skin, I instantly snapped out of it and realized how stupid I was being. Yes, I still get sad and I still have my moments where I don't care about anything...but I'm no where near how I used to be. One day, you'll just snap out of it.

(I am not recommending a near death experience, by any means.)

Thanks for that little bit of your backround. Can I ask you what you do when you come home from work? Do you still muddle around or do you try and be productive in some way?

I find that my "depression" is the worst when I have time on my hands.

JibbJibb - I dont know how depressed I am, but I will say some people suffer from it much more than others. Heck, I think my depression has worsened ALOT over the years. I never thought about suicide or excluded myself from social activity before. Im still hopeful I can get ris of it though.

 

[10000Days]

There are conflicting arguments for either. I still believe medication and therapy are the best options depression cases have at this moment in time. Unless your a scientologist, then I have no idea what im talking about.

I agree completely. For some reason my mentality right now is that I can get rid of this myself though which sounds messed up considering how long ive been depressed.

 

[10000Days]

Can I ask everyone here what theyve been doing for the past 4 or 5 hours?

Ive been on the computer waisting time which makes me think Im powerless over this depression. Sometimes it feels like my life is so cold and pathetic that distracting myself with the computer is the only way to feel better. Only just now have I woken up a little bit by these discussions.

 

[jibbijib]

Hey, depression is tough. I won't lie. But it's kind of silly at the same time.


I've battled it for so long. Socially excluding myself, contemplating suicide. Seeking attention all the time. It's not really any good at all. But when you can find the light and just go for it instead of letting things hold you back into that dpression, then you can control it.

Maybe it's natural to go into recluse for a bit and feel depressed. Just to make you think of things you need to improve upon. If you look at it that way, you could possibly use depression as a tool to help better your life. Thus it would shorten the periods of depression and give more back to you since you will be fighting to live a better life.

Make sense?

 

[10000Days]

Hey, depression is tough. I won't lie. But it's kind of silly at the same time.


I've battled it for so long. Socially excluding myself, contemplating suicide. Seeking attention all the time. It's not really any good at all. But when you can find the light and just go for it instead of letting things hold you back into that dpression, then you can control it.

Maybe it's natural to go into recluse for a bit and feel depressed. Just to make you think of things you need to improve upon. If you look at it that way, you could possibly use depression as a tool to help better your life. Thus it would shorten the periods of depression and give more back to you since you will be fighting to live a better life.

Make sense?

Actually yeah. A lot of scientists actually think depression is a survival mechanism we have always had in order to...um...survive. You actually nailed their reasoning right on the head.

 

[L3ggy]

Bust be painful to have nails on the head.

 

[Magnet]

I was pretty depressed a couple years ago (probably still am - just not as bad)

I never went to the doctor, never took any pills or anything. I just let time heal it and im much better now.

One of the best things you can do and it helped me was
-go to college (do something productive throughout the day)
-get a job
-get a hobby (weather it be bowling, going to the movies once a week, anything really)

Its pretty natural for people to get depressed, but I agree with you that its way to over medicated.

 

[DOA82]

I have actually. My doctor gave me two different prescriptions which I tried but neither impacted me in a positive way. I also tend to think depression is an overblown illness that is way overly medicated. Thats why Im not going back.

Ive read a few books on the topic. Im trying some of the techniques they suggest but here I am.

If you are depressed, in your case the best prescription would be one sharp razor blade twice a day. Repeat until dizziness occurs, if problem does not persist, seek another doseage. After a few applications your problem (and ours i.e you) should dispear!

 

[blake345]

That was great. Have you been through depression?

One of the weird things is that Ive read from so many sources to "Just force yourself to spend time with family and friends."

Ill do this and end up feeling ten times worse because of it.

Im working on the whole productivity thing but today has been abysmal. I think I jacked off like, and Im not kidding, around 15 times.

Haha, thats gotta be a record.....but anyways, i've felt that way and suffered from depression, panic attacks, etc. and trust me, boring days make everything 20 times worse. I never took medicine for it, i did things that made me feel better. I started becoming aware of the things i ate, and i cut down on excessive behavior (crazy 3 hour beat-off sessions, eating until i wanted to puke,etc). You need a change of pace, you have to do something different, that makes you feel good...i don't know you, so its hard to say what that might be. Most importantly you should talk to someone who cares about you personally, and whom you're not afraid to open up to, its very therapeutic to hear someone tell you that they don't want you to feel the way you are feeling, it is for me anyways.

 

[10000Days]

Haha, thats gotta be a record.....but anyways, i've felt that way and suffered from depression, panic attacks, etc. and trust me, boring days make everything 20 times worse. I never took medicine for it, i did things that made me feel better. I started becoming aware of the things i ate, and i cut down on excessive behavior (crazy 3 hour beat-off sessions, eating until i wanted to puke,etc). You need a change of pace, you have to do something different, that makes you feel good...i don't know you, so its hard to say what that might be. Most importantly you should talk to someone who cares about you personally, and whom you're not afraid to open up to, its very therapeutic to hear someone tell you that they don't want you to feel the way you are feeling, it is for me anyways.

Great post. Part of me says that to myself but its awesome hearing it from someone else. You have no idea how much you just described me in that post.

 

[ChefChiTown]

Thanks for that little bit of your backround. Can I ask you what you do when you come home from work? Do you still muddle around or do you try and be productive in some way?

I find that my "depression" is the worst when I have time on my hands.

To be honest, I don't have a lot of friends here in Chicago. Well, let me rephrase that...I have friends, but they're all work friends. So, when I come home from work, the last thing I want to do is hang out with people I just saw all day long.

I usually work 80-90 works, as I am a chef and have to put in long work days, but recently I've been delegating my responsibilities to people who work "for" me. I was wearing myself out at work, so I've cut down my hours a lot, that way, I can enjoy some time to myself.

When I'm off of work I usually just sit around, drink some beers, watch TV, watch movies or play video games. And, obviously, I come online and talk to my FreeOnes friends.

Hey, depression is tough. I won't lie. But it's kind of silly at the same time.

I've battled it for so long. Socially excluding myself, contemplating suicide. Seeking attention all the time. It's not really any good at all. But when you can find the light and just go for it instead of letting things hold you back into that dpression, then you can control it.

Maybe it's natural to go into recluse for a bit and feel depressed. Just to make you think of things you need to improve upon. If you look at it that way, you could possibly use depression as a tool to help better your life. Thus it would shorten the periods of depression and give more back to you since you will be fighting to live a better life.

Make sense?

I know that when I was going through my phase of "depression", I didn't give a shit about anything. I had no emotion at all running through my heart. I wouldn't smile, but I wouldn't frown. I wouldn't laugh, but I wouldn't get sad. It was like I was a shell of a man, with no ability to feel anything, positive or negative.

Then, I eventually started to feel sad all of the time for some reason. My sadness would just multiply and multiply and it just made me go down this pointless downward spiral at an unbelievable rate. After so much time went by, I couldn't take it anymore and I kept asking myself "why", as in "why me?" I didn't want to feel sad anymore so I started to cut into my wrist. Then, as I saw the blood come out I was instantly thrown into an emotional state of shock and woke up. I remember standing there like "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ME?!?!?!" Then, I instantly snapped out of it and realized that I was being a huge cry baby bitch and everything that I used to blame the world for was all MY fault.

The world didn't make me sad...I did. The world didn't make me loaf around and hate life...I did. The world didn't make me put a blade to my wrist...I did. I was just going through a phase of "depression" that everybody else experiences, but I chose to let it ruin me. Personally, I think that a lot of people don't realize how stupid they're being until it's too late. I was just lucky enough that I snapped out of it when I did or else I wouldn't be here.

 

[jibbijib]

I get overly depressed around wintertime because I can't ride the bike anymore. So basically thats a hobby of mine that keeps me connected with social life. For the longest time I went depression free because of it. It's nice to jump on the bike and go for a ride somewhere and enjoy the beauty of the country side.

 

[10000Days]

DOA84 - You suck.

Everyone else - Thanks.

 

[H47]

I suffer from depression. Or I should say, I used to. Since now I am on several different antidepressant medications. Now I feel great.

 

[10000Days]

Great post ChefChiTown and JibbJibb.

 

[10000Days]

I suffer from depression. Or I should say, I used to. Since now I am on several different antidepressant medications. Now I feel great.

What are you doing to fight depression that isnt medication? What are the big points in your life? School? Work? Any activities? Learning anything new?

 

[squirly286]

I have been through depression myself..and I am still alittle depressed right now. My first case of depression was because my gf of 4 years broke up with me..that was 4 or 5 years ago..how I got over that was goin out drinking and hanging with my friends everynight. Now hangin with your friends and meetin new people may help..I wouldnt suggest drinking a case of beer everynight. I did that and..yea it was some of the best times of my life..but it also led to me getting addicting to painkillers. The alcohol was no longer dealin with the pain..so i turned to percs..which im not gonna lie..was also a good time..but comin off of them mother fukers makes you even more depressed!! After awhile I just forgot about her and made so many friends that I didnt need any of the drugs..still drank but not as much. My situation now is that I have a good job working for DYFS..but I am gettin older and every goal I had set for myself in highschool..I havnt done shit to accomplish. Could be like someone said..its winter and its a depressing time. I know what I need to do I just have no ambition to do it right now..so not too sure what else to tell ya..good luck bro!!

 

[H47]

What are you doing to fight depression that isnt medication? What are the big points in your life? School? Work? Any activities? Learning anything new?

I go to a mental health center every day. Monday through Friday. I go to group therapy there.

 

[10000Days]

squirley - I also lack that ambition but I feel/hope ambition is something you can work on and develope. Are you doing anything to get yourself out of the rut your in or are you just living with it?

H47 - Good stuff. I wish I had the courage to do something like that/

 

[bodie54]

That seems to be the generally mentality of depression but after doing a little research I think its one of the least known illnesses out there.

For example, is depression a result of a chemical imbalance or a cause?

Exogenous depression manifests as a reaction to events. Every one of us has experienced it to one degree or another.

Endogenous depression is caused by chemical imbalances in the brain.