I almost made it to the shitter, but...

[simontim]

Post of the goddamned year so far!:bowdown:

Reminds me of this one time I was at a construction site in Manhattan and with no plumbing yet and I had to take one of those shits that stick out of the top of the water and I just ducked into a poor janitors closet and let fly in one of his garbage buckets and wiped my ass with one of his yellow dusting cloths.

It smelled really bad so I opened a can of his furniture polish and emptied the whole thing in the bucket to try and mask the stink.....it didn't work.

So to that janitor, I'd like to say "sorry Javier, my bad!" :wave2:

Yes, that was his real name.........

my name's Jose, and you better hope i never find your nasty ass

 

[thebear247]

this thread is awesome yeah im guilty of not making it to the restroom.

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

you're lucky she didn't **** in your mouth you nasty man

Ever heard of multi-quote? :dunno:

 

[maildude]

Actually it gets better...So I make it to the restroom, finish shitting, ditch the boxers, and make for the door. As I'm walking past the "scene of the crime" I notice that all the evidence is gone! Some poor bastard had to clean that **** up!!! Now that I say it, I kinda feel bad! LOL

Goddammit!! That was my nephew Ralph who had to clean it up!!!

 

[simontim]

Truth be told, I'm guilty of shitting my pants about 2 or 3 times a year, sometimes publicly, other times not, but I think this story is more entertaning than anything I can tell...



Or, if you prefer the auto-tuned version of the same story, I suggest watching this...

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1921388

fuckin baseball players

 

[simontim]

Maybe you needthese:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/10308/saturday-night-live-oops-i-crapped-my-pants

oops, i crapped my pants

 

[on]

I was walking home from bar once. I had to **** so bad and there was no way I was making it home. So I was cutting through a park, noticed somebody with a pool and some shirts and towels in the backyard. I hopped their fence, **** in the backyard, cleaned my asshole with the pool water and wiped it all up with their towel.

You gotta do what you gotta do.

your dna will be on file man, if you get arrested now, you will be charged with the garden ****, also, If I posted this thread what would happen?

 

[CadillacD]

Goddammit!! That was my nephew Ralph who had to clean it up!!!

Tell Ralph that they need more TP in the men's room! LMAO!!!

 

[EwaSonnetIsGod]

And I thought I was having a shitty day....