FreeOnes Members' Collaborative Story

[mikey5ni]

Sorry - I forgot about the "one sentence" rule. So here's the revised version:

"What the fuck........??" yelled Chris, and before anyone could react Ulrika, who had been hiding down a nearby alleyway, rushed forward, put her .357 Magnum to Chris's head and blew his brains all over the street, screaming
"That's for Sasha, you bastard!" as she took off back down the alley and left Rick to vomit profusely at the horrible sight before him.

 

[Anonymous2]

He tried to avert his eyes but somehow couldn't, although a voice inside his head told him to get going and follow the shadow that was Urika into the alley.

 

[ÆGEAN]

he turned suddendly and heard lound honking noises......were they geese? he questioned to himself.

 

[Dixie Normus]

"Why are these geese shitting on me", he further queried himself, as a rather large amount of geese droppings landed about is head and shoulders.

 

[dirac]

Rich was soon overcome with all the Geese shit and soon drowned, he thought: ah fuck!

 

[mikey5ni]

Meanwhile, unknown to Ulrika the alleyway contained a cosmic wormhole which, in her haste to escape, she accidentally hurtled into and was carried back in time to a few seconds before she had run out of that very same alley to empty Chris's stupid fucking head.

 

[negator]

. . .the end.

 

[belfastsixpack]

or so they thought...

 

[dick van cock]

EPILOGUE: (Brechtian style)

{the entire cast steps in front of the curtain and sings}

Avanti popolo, alla riscossa,
bandiera rossa, bandiera rossa.
Avanti popolo, alla riscossa,
bandiera rossa trionfera.

{the third angel moves to the right proscenium}

Third Angel:

"Comrades! Remember! Society cannot share a common communication system so long as it is split into warring factions!"

{Saint Joan beating on a trombone - sic!}

Saint Joan:

Amen, brother vulture!

{Third angel retreats; second angel moves to center front stage}

Second Angel:

"Mr. Wurlitzer, I am now in a position to receive your organ"

{Arturo Ui sneezes}

Saint Joan:

"That was my line, Mr. Angel!"

{Second Angel retreats; First Angel moves to right proscenium}

First Angel:

"You may proclaim, good sirs, your fine philosophy
But till you feed us, right and wrong can wait!"

Peachum:

Men aren't smart enough or sly
Any rogue can blind them
With a clever lie.

{entire cast sings}

He's one the very devil fears to battle
He is a butcher, all the rest are cattle
Though he's a pimping hound - no jail keeps him in
But who will make him bite the dust? It's women!

It's useless to resist. No-one is free.
There's no escape from sexual slavery.

dick van cock:

"The bitch that bore me is in heat again."

THE END