cool harmless ways to piss people off (rep for funny)

T

takeeleven

Pornstar poolboy for hire!!
In this world i dont think theres anyway to not piss someone off even if it seems harmless. but i think pulling up next to a man and woman in a car and honking at them and get them to roll down the window, when the window rolls down say " hey dude, fuck her, I did". see if that doesnt get him pissed off!
 
Mayhem

Mayhem

Banned
When we were going to the M-16 range in Basic Training, I'd keep my squeezy bottle of CLP (gun oil) handy. The beautiful thing about M-16s is the handguard completely covers most of the barrel and has holes in it. So when some guy wasn't looking, I'd squeeze some oil onto their cold barrel. When they were on the firing line and started shooting, within 5 shots the oil would start smoking something fierce. Add to this the fact that a major percentage of trainees knew squat about guns at all, some would freak right out, thinking their rifle was going to explode like a grenade. Good times.
 
Tittyman5000

Tittyman5000

Buy some Ghost Chili or Habanero and rub it on common things at parties your invited to :D I put them in a small tupper ware & was recently invited to a baby shower and when no one was looking I smashed some against the button of a water fountain ( wearing a rubber glove of course ) and also on the door handle to the mens restroom :)
 
S

Stefanh

Put a tiny cakroach on someone else's shirt and shout out! :hairpull:

Just make sure you stay away from him otherwise he might throw it off to you!
 
N

Null8008

Put glitter inside the heat vents of their car, then turn the blower up to max. The next time they turn their car on, INSTANT FABULOUS!
 
gunslingingbird

gunslingingbird

Jarib said:
Fart inside a room and make sure you ran fast!
Click to expand...

True story: I was setting up a show at a hotel about 2 years ago. I felt the need to release some hot air, as I do occasionally, so I looked for a nice, secluded place backstage where I wouldn't offend anyone with my stench (which had been particularly bad that day). I found my spot, left my present, and walked away. As I got to the other side of the room I watched with part embarrassment and part delight as the show's keynote speaker, Madame Speakcunt of the House Nancy Pelosi, walked out of the green room and straight into my foul little cloud. She made a sour face and walked faster. I wasn't intending on crop dusting anyone that day, but I couldn't've asked for a better target. :D
 
gunslingingbird

gunslingingbird

cleland said:
Glue a twenty dollar bill on the street or any wall and try to video those who will try to get it.
Click to expand...

How about putting a $20 inside a urinal? You know SOMEONE would eventually grab it. :D
 
Ace Boobtoucher

Ace Boobtoucher

Founder and Captain of the Douchepatrol
I used to love super gluing quarters to the sidewalk near the side entrance of the Horseshoe casino a while back. Surveillance would store the recordings of the funnier attempts to retrieve them and broadcast the video to our security office. Some of the bums would go to great lengths to get a quarter.

- - - Updated - - -

zeeblofowl_1969 said:
Keep asking someone the same question every 10 minutes or so and no matter how they answer act like its the very first time.
Click to expand...

My stepfather does that. He has Alzheimer's.
 
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