Best lines to dump a girlfriend

[Violator79]

"I'm sorry baby, but I prefer my brother from another mother."

 

[McNab]

A deranged chick a used to go with phoned me once and said, "it's not working out between us".

I said, "OK, bye!" And hung up. Easy.

 

[angela&felicity]

Honesty is the best one. But if you really need a line just say that you don't love her. Or that she is not your type. Once i got my ex really angry telling her that she had ugly tits hahahha.

 

[McRocket]

One of the most emotionally painful things most people will go through (other then death or major illnesses/accidents) is to get dumped. Especially if they do not see it coming.

So to use a 'line' on her is pretty insensitive, IMO.

And if you want serious advice, how can I give that? I have no idea why you want to end it.

But if you want out, tell her as quickly and as honestly as possible.

It is times like this that, I think, decide how strong of a person you really are. It's hard to do something you know will hurt someone you care about. But the faster you end it; the faster she can move on to someone who will want her more then you do.
Ending the relationship is the best thing you could do for her. And if you do it with respect and some honour - then I think you are doing her a big favour.

Sorry to sound preachy, but this woman is about to (probably) get her feelings very badly hurt. How you handle it can make it a WHOLE lot better for her.

 

[Plastique]

Ok, ok.. enough with the honesty "advice". Deed is done (and yes I used honesty) now back to the funnies please.

 

[KungFuDude]

"I took a good look at your mother, and well, I don't want to be married to THAT in 20 years."

 

[ChefChiTown]

"I probably should've told you this before we had dirty, unprotected sex, but...Magic Johnson gave me AIDS."

 

[ThatRedWing]

Remember that nymphomania patient with the IV drug using crackhead boyfriend? Weeellll......

 

[KungFuDude]

"Remember that thing I asked you to do? Remember how you said you wouldn't? Well, your best friend said she would..."

 

[sputnikgirl]

It's not me, it's you....

 

[poopfacejim]

"You have a mustache..."

or

"You have a mustache and I don't, but there can be only one man in this relationship and I have the balls to prove it."

 

[swaki]

while having sex talk about u boring day at the office " and then fred got us all coffe and then we all said it was the wrong one and then he whent back down, even though it was the right order and then we all laugh, and then all the pcs broked down and then i calld the guy from..."

 

[anomaly]

I'm feeling emotionally indifferent about this relationship and I need time to figure it out.

 

[ShowtimeGator]

Welcome to Dump City population You!

 

[Joaqo]

mmmmm just don't call her for three weeks, she will get it eventually.

 

[ChefChiTown]

Ask her if she will video tape you having sex with your own father. If she agrees...dump her for being a piece of shit. If she says no...dump her for being a piece of shit who doesn't love you and isn't willing to do anything to make you happy.

Either way, she's the piece of crap.