500 things we've learned from porn

[ArabJames]

91. Every massage has a happy ending

 

[xpiritual]

70. Even while a woman is on her knees, giving one hell of a blow job with her artificially inflated lips, the man must constantly remind her to "Suck it..."
71. Asian men don't exist
72. There's nothing a woman loves more than having some ex-con with a receding hair line pull her asshole open like he's looking for treasure, and then spit in the hole.
73. The colon and rectum are the cleanest places in the body
74. There's nothing as sensual, romantic, or moving as choking, insulting, humiliating, or just plain slapping the shit out of your gal
75. makeup doesn't come off while having sex
76. Every female locker room is subject to an all girl orgy of 5 to 25 participants
77. No one gets pregnant, ever.
78. Men will always announce when cumming is imminent, and will make zombie noises the whole time they are cumming
79. We've learned that some fans are never satisfied until all women in the biz do anal
80. Sex is less fun to watch when there's a plot involved.


H

:rofl: haha, You are the best!!! :hatsoff:

 

[oeoeoeoe]

bump...only 420 more to go

 

[jamrak]

71. Asian men don't exist

well, you can call me an asshole, but once again I will the one who busts the myth:



:1orglaugh

 

[The Paulinator]

81. Headaches are non-existant
82. She is never interested in "being friends"
83. When you are done with her, she is done with you....no stalking.

 

[cunnilingophile]

84. The same woman can be Latina, Black, Asian, Arab or Indian, depending on the clip she appears in.
85. Being Asian means Japanese, Filippino, Korean, Chinese, Thai or any other nationality in Asia depending on the scene.

 

[The Paulinator]

Shit! mine should have been #92-94^^

:o

 

[stampede2873]

59. Incest is ok as long as when you ask your aunt "What's going on?" she responds with "You're getting your cock sucked, kid." (Anybody?)

Thats from "Satisfactions" I believe. I know its the scene with Honey Wilder and Tom Byron. I can't for the life of me remember who said, "your getting your cock sucked, kid"

 

[Imagine]

86. A surprisingly large percentage of the population suffers from coprolalia (often mistaken for Tourette's Syndrome).

 

[Nester6]

1.you can stick your dick in a girls ass without lube,and she'll enjoy
2.teachers like to fuck there students
3.goggling on a dick is attractive(ava devine)
4.when you fuck a girl,have a mean look on your face to convince her that you're a hardass
5.you have to fuck a girl in EVERY position when you have sex

That following porn is better than following any religion.

 

[TheAdmiral]

87. You can save your job, good grades, etc. with a good fuck

 

[katz]

88. Women always wear high heels when having sex and have no problems at all in different positions like the reverse-cowboy over a bed, for instance...

 

[katz]

I almost forgot...
89. Women only have sex with their hair just done... just a few hours after leaving their hair-dressers, not more!

 

[robbied196]

90. Silicone is man's best friend, not a dog!
91. Always pull your cock out before you cum!
92. If you shoot anything less than a cupful there's something wrong with you!
93. Spit is free lube!
94. All women are bi-sexual!

 

[robbied196]

95. When you shove your cock in an asshole it comes out clean!

 

[robbied196]

96. If you find a hole in the wall and stick your dick through it, you'll get a blowjob!

 

[robbied196]

97. If the mattress isn't soaked through, she hasn't cum!

 

[Baill Inneraora]

98. 98% of sexual encounters are not in a bed

 

[Roald]

99. japanese porn is weird
100. condoms are a no no

 

[h00t3rl0v3r]

101. The poop chute is not only an exit!