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It should certainly inspire you to buy a dictionary and find out how to spell 'thanks':hatsoff:

Lovely clean pillows.. My God, how did she get them so whiter-than-white? I wonder if she uses a non-bio washing powder, I'll have to try some myself.

I liked mystery men. I think you missed the point of it.. :dunno:

idiot... than was Lenny Henry's number. Mind you, I told him that he was an unfunny, tall, skinny fucker, while I was on... saves me having to phone him next week :thumbsup:

Oh.. it was nothing. No, really, it was nothing.. I have nothing to do with the running of the board, so you see I did nothing:dunno:

mmmmmmmmmm.. chocolate

The Freeones server is creaking under the strain of the current pic sizes... It would be the picture that broke the servers back (you see what I did there.., eh? taking the straw/camels back thing and then... oh never mind.. :sleep:)

So THAT'S where my 'weird' uncle joe went..

Sorry, but I have no sympathy. You must know that mobile phone internet is pricey to start with, no matter who the provider is. Don't want to pay?. don't use - simples

I prefer to use 'twatter' I go around being a complete twat to people, then I write about it in black felt-tip on my ass. here is my latest entry: "Logged onto Freeones - unfortunately Blueballs is still there, the OCSM's are still ignoring my pleas for sex and some guy got drunk and...

I would just hang my johnson out from under the duvet.. it would slither around the room until it found it's target.

I wanted to escape from my former life, as a crime-fighting trapeze artist, with a liking for sniffing small furry animals. The Freeones members welcomed me with open legs...

Re: FactZone Prof Stephen Hawking holds the current world record for the 200m hurdles and can bench press over 150kg You wouldn't think it when you look at him, but just think Andy Pipkin from little Britain.

dum[p her and then take a long walk off a short bridge. Then she'll be mine... ALL MINE... MUHAHAHAHHAAAA

We still think you're awesome, Greg :bowdown:

She got her dress sense from her grandmother Hilda and her disgusting bad habits from her grandfather Stan. Also, she got quite a surprising gift from Eddie Yates, the lodger.. but we can't go into such matters on here.

Just like a female version of James Bond... can I be her ultimate foe 'Dr Yes... please'

"gets a free cam show..." there I did EXACTLY as you said.. wait.. what?... dammit

Pornstars on this forum?.. you're havin' a laugh.

...but most are just happy for a quick kiss and a grope. :nanner:

Good or bad movie.. it's got the gorgeous Maryam D'abo in it :bowdown:

You're an idiot

This might fit the description: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096134/

Re: FactZone 67% of facts are made up on the spot... 53% of people already know that.

My keyboard is very dirty... It keeps asking me to smother it in chocolate and take it roughly from behind.

It's amazing what five-year olds can type these days...

Look.. if we're going to go down this 'mine is bigger than yours' road, let me just say, I'm happy with my little 4g speed, it may not be much, but I know how to use it.. Size DOESN'T matter.... it doesn't.... really.... :crying:

7.5s 5.2s if there's a woman involved

When you say 'Aware'.. is it like when a deeply comatose person is 'aware' that people are around and trying to reach them? BTW: visiting hours for this board are now 8.00-9.30am & 3.00-5.00pm The board cannot permit people to visit and browse the board outside of these hours... Matron's...

Re: Does Paul the octopus have visionary abillities? no... but he can pick his nose, ass, ears and solve a rubik's cube at the same time.

Since we're requesting things that we don't want to pay for.. Can someone send me an expensive-looking hooker to me, ta...:hatsoff: btw: Petra.. clean up your yard, it's a f*cking disgrace. ps.. that deckchair is So 70's seafront cheap'n'nasty gift shop ("oh tunsty...

I was going to say that this could end his career.. But I guess judging by some of his recent films, that already happened...

"I think we need a bigger.... bun"

Indeed, mice commissioned Slartibartfast to help build the Earth Mk1..

Oh no... Who will I turn to for annoying leaflets and flyers to put through my letterbox? I might have to start buying real toilet paper...

Mr Trebor.. sorry, Trebus. It has been claimed, that you are in fact the bastard lovechild of a chance meeting between an Elephant and Dawn French (apparently, the only way to tell them apart is the fact that the elephant is a talented comedian) Is this true? If not, can you at least get me...

Re: Ala Passtel / Gabriela I think it's her short hair that does that. I think she'd be stunning with longer hair, possibly with a ponytail.

OMG.. People may actually have to start caring for their animals.

Ice Cream Van Tune? 1 - Match of the Day 2 - Monty Python Theme 3 - Popeye Theme 4 - Captain Pugwash 5 - World Cup 78 Theme 6 - Teddy Bears Picnic 7 - Greensleeves 8 - Bring Me Sunshine (Morecambe & Wise theme) 9 - Whistle While You Work (From Snow White...) 10 - Other Bored...

Give her boobs a squeeze - from me.. :hatsoff:

EXACTLY.. indeed, I was rather looking forward to some full-on pics of teabags and some revealing shots of china teacups

Waaaiiit a minute.. Did you leave that little 'deposit' on my Liberace '77 tour gold lurex jacket? You KNOW how difficult it is to get stains of that thing.:mad:

me.. no, wait.... yeah, still me.

Sounds more like it's Pop-Tarts your after.

He should have stuck to bashing his bishop...

So... How'ya doin' at the moment? Not that I care very much, nor that I'm particularly interested and I'm certainly am not coming round to your house for an hour, to be served weak tea and tasteless biscuits, while you drone on about your troubles.. Soooo.. Why not just give your life...

So I guess she won't be going to the ball tonight...

see.. If you wore your dungarees this wouldn't happen. As we all know they are a right bastard to get out of.

Dammit.. Just beaten to posting my own 'Have you fapped on me' thread. Of course , I already know the ones who have.. Hows it goin BB :wave2:

Some special world cup examples: Mertesacker Emptiness (Motorcycle Emptiness - Manic Street Preachers) A Messi of Blues (A Mess Of Blues - Elvis Presley) We Klose Our Eyes (We Close Our Eyes - Go West) What Beckham's Of The Broken Hearted (What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted - Jimmy Ruffin)...