Harder to be a ***?

[lurkingdirk]

What do you think? It's hard to be a ***. Is it harder than a ***?

1) When we gain weight we can’t blame the pregnancies.

2) When one of your ********* gets in a fight at school and your other ******** yells, “Sweep the leg Johnny” everyone blames you.

3) Our fingers aren’t made for little buttons. They’re just not. If buttons needed hammering we’d be the ones to call. Finessing buttons? Not so much.

4) **** can’t guilt our ******** by saying, “We carried you for nine months.”

5) “Wait until your Mommy gets home” just doesn’t sound as scary. It just doesn’t.

6) There are never…and I mean never…changing tables for babies in men’s bathrooms. That makes things…messy. Tricky and messy.

7) We don’t match clothes so well. If there were more **** dressing ****, Garanimals would be made for every age of a *****’s life. I’d seriously be sending my **** to college with monkeys and tigers on their tags. In fact, as the **** got bigger you could do larger ******* like rhinos, hippos or whales. Now, it’s possible girls don’t want whales on their tags but we could work that out later in therapy.

8) Moms can disguise a diaper bag as a pocketbook. No matter what, men can’t make a diaper bag look cool.

9) No matter what, guys can’t look cool in a minivan. Let’s face it, if there were more **** at home with **** there’d be convertible minivans and ******* minivans. But there’s not.

10) When women see **** out with **** they assume we’re sensitive people who like to chit chat. We’re guys. We don’t chit or chat. When we see people we know we say “hey” but we don’t stop moving. We never stop moving. We’re like sharks in that way.

11) If you’re out with a buddy along with your **** out somewhere, people come up to you to tell you they support your right to adopt ******** and they love Elton John’s music.

12) **** go to *** for hugs. They go to **** for tickle fights. And let’s face it tickle fights are a lot harder. Everyone wins in a hug. There are no winners in a tickle fight because they never end.

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[L3ggy]

12) **** go to *** for hugs. They go to **** for tickle fights. And let’s face it tickle fights are a lot harder. Everyone wins in a hug. There are no winners in a tickle fight because they never end.

Until the *** passes out or pees in his/her pants.

 

[UrMaSucksDonkey]

No because ***'s can walk away and they don't have centuries of social conditioning on there asses either.....Believe it or not....Not all women even want alimony.

 

[lurkingdirk]

No because ***'s can walk away and they don't have centuries of social conditioning on there asses either.....Believe it or not....Not all women even want alimony.

:surprise:

There's no social conditioning on ****?

 

[Ace Bandage]

*** is the most difficult job in the world. Fact.

Much respect.

 

[Member442]

I have issue with 9. No one looks good in a minivan men or women. I **** mine. They just don't make anything cooler that does what a minivan can for a ******.

 

[TheOrangeCat]

Minivans are where the last vestige of your youthful cool goes to die

 

[blindedinchains]

*** is the most difficult job in the world. Fact.

Much respect.

This

 

[mikekingx]

That was pretty funny.

 

[Bloodshot Scott]

Yes, it's harder to be a ******, but I disagree with the amount of power they hold over relationships. Like Dr. Drew said, 'women hold the keys' to the relationship. A guy could bend over backwards and a female would work his ass over for ***** support, and I've seen it happen to very dear friends for no reason other than bullshit. Not all women, of course, but enough for me to find it very troubling. :2 cents:

 

[UrMaSucksDonkey]

:surprise:

There's no social conditioning on ****?

Well there is to a certain extent....He must provide as in be the main bread winner bull....But apparantly this is now antiquated **** that has been designed to keep the female down:dunno: Perhaps it because men like this power....It is misused mostly in the stupid macho culture that it usually prevails in.....But don't get me wrong women are fucked they find these guys to be most desirable.

 

[lurkingdirk]

Well there is to a certain extent....He must provide as in be the main bread winner bull....But apparantly this is now antiquated **** that has been designed to keep the female down:dunno: Perhaps it because men like this power....It is misused mostly in the stupid macho culture that is usually prevails in.....But don't get me wrong women are fucked they find these guys to be most desirable.

ehhh. I'm not going to comment on that.

Think about this, people: Imagine being a single ***. Does society have the conventions for single **** like it does for single moms?

I can answer that. No.

 

[Alyssa Rose]

5) “Wait until your Mommy gets home” just doesn’t sound as scary. It just doesn’t.

One of my BIGGEST pet peeves.. I think women who use the "wait until your ****** gets home" line on their ******** are lazy, idiots who don't feel like pulling their own weight in the relationship.. Your **** shouldn't think that it's okay to walk all over you while **** not home.. They should fear you both equally.. Not only does it say that you're a doormat that they can walk all over but it also makes their *** "the bad guy" which is super shitty. (This also goes both ways, the *** shouldn't make the *** look like the bad guy either.) Your *** should know that if they do something wrong, regardless of what parent is home, it's going to be dealt with then & there, not when "***** gets home"

/rant. :o

 

[darkwarrior3007]

Number 6 is not true at all!