don't "wank" on Christmas anymore. About 12 years ago (give or take), I worked a nice big gooey one out, then went to take a shower and get ready for all of the family stuff I had to do. Before I jumped in the shower, I went piss. As I stood there I got an itchy feeling in my pee hole and suddenly a stream of blood fired from my cock...at right angles to the actuall direction it was aiming and splattered all over the wall next to me. Well, about a second after the flow started (it seemed like a decade) my knees went numb and my heart begane to race. I thought...Oh fuck!!! I have cancer...God is punishing me for masturbating on his birthday...oh fuck, what am I gonna do? Well as my eyes welled up with tears and I tried to get my head straight, I looked for a rag and disinfectant to clean up and begane begging for forgivness (to God of course...for rubbing one off on his birthday). I finished cleaning and tried to find my doctors home number, called him and was told to relax and he would see me the next day. In the mean time, a second piss came up...this one started out all blood, but trailed off to pee, which made me less freaked out...but still, you know...no man wants to see blood coming out of his pecker!!! Well anyway, I went and saw the doctor, went to a hospital a couple of days later, had a test, and nothing was there. They told me I must have had a kidney stone, passed it and not known. So, ever since that Christmas morning...I still can't bring myself to rub one out...I just can't. But the wife can!!!!!
