Your Christmas wank?

[Mymessages74]

Who's been the inspiration for your first wank on Christmas Day?

Mine have been:
Nina Mercedez and Jennifer Aniston - both together!

 

[om3ga]

An Xmas wank???

:rofl:

Too busy arguing over arranging the Xmas dinner & dessert to think of bashing the bishop.....

 

[Mr. Daystar]

don't "wank" on Christmas anymore. About 12 years ago (give or take), I worked a nice big gooey one out, then went to take a shower and get ready for all of the family stuff I had to do. Before I jumped in the shower, I went piss. As I stood there I got an itchy feeling in my pee hole and suddenly a stream of blood fired from my cock...at right angles to the actuall direction it was aiming and splattered all over the wall next to me. Well, about a second after the flow started (it seemed like a decade) my knees went numb and my heart begane to race. I thought...Oh fuck!!! I have cancer...God is punishing me for masturbating on his birthday...oh fuck, what am I gonna do? Well as my eyes welled up with tears and I tried to get my head straight, I looked for a rag and disinfectant to clean up and begane begging for forgivness (to God of course...for rubbing one off on his birthday). I finished cleaning and tried to find my doctors home number, called him and was told to relax and he would see me the next day. In the mean time, a second piss came up...this one started out all blood, but trailed off to pee, which made me less freaked out...but still, you know...no man wants to see blood coming out of his pecker!!! Well anyway, I went and saw the doctor, went to a hospital a couple of days later, had a test, and nothing was there. They told me I must have had a kidney stone, passed it and not known. So, ever since that Christmas morning...I still can't bring myself to rub one out...I just can't. But the wife can!!!!!

 

[member2686]

Three words: TOO MUCH INFORMATION. :eek:

:rofl2: Thanks for the mildly funny story, though. Can't believe you're still superstitious about it... Too funny! lol

 

[Death_blooms08]

I could make some funny joke about this, but after passing my second kidney stone last month, revidffum's post just makes me want to cry remembering how much that hurt.

 

[member20672]

A thread jacking if we ever needed one:eek:

I'm saving mine for someone special

LOL

 

[poggy]

Wonder if he wrapped it up and gave to someone as a present.

 

[member2686]

He should give it to the dude who wanted to taste his own cum. lmao :1orglaugh :rofl:

Wonder if he wrapped it up and gave to someone as a present.

 

[hedonis]

No need to wank... there was a special present delivered to me in bed.

:thumbsup:
JW

 

[McRocket]

Three words: TOO MUCH INFORMATION. :eek:

:rofl2: Thanks for the mildly funny story, though. Can't believe you're still superstitious about it... Too funny! lol

Actually, I disagree. I thought he shared something rather personal - if it was true (though at first, I admit I was cringing). And one can NEVER get too personal as far as I am concerned - as long as intentions are good.

 

[Mymessages74]

What have I started? Just kidding. Can't criticise him for his honesty.

Let's bring this thread back to the original topic.

I've still got Nina Mercedez on the brain - or should that be in my trousers?

I think I need to put one of her DVDs on....

 

[member2686]

LOL! Next we're gonna have some guy posting "something rather personal" like that he had undigested peanuts or corn in his feces or something today. :eek: :throwup:

Yeah, I definitely think there's a line where you can politely say "T.M.I." lol

Actually, I disagree. I thought he shared something rather personal - if it was true (though at first, I admit I was cringing). And one can NEVER get too personal as far as I am concerned - as long as intentions are good.

 

[McRocket]

LOL! Next we're gonna have some guy posting "something rather personal" like that he had undigested peanuts or corn in his feces or something today. :eek: :throwup:

Yeah, I definitely think there's a line where you can politely say "T.M.I." lol

Not me. There is never such a thing as T.M.I. to me. Life is full of people holding back. That way you learn little.
I hate holding back.
But far and away most people like it.
No offense, but thank goodness I am not one of them.

 

[D-rock]

Maybe his Christmas wank helped him. After all if he passed it out and didn't realize it that is probably better than it passing through your system for a long time while causing excruciating pain.

 

[juballs]

how do people find time for this on christmas??? im out from 9am-9pm!!!

 

[qweretyuiopas@]

To much family around today, didnt even think about it till i came to this thread lmao, I was too busy cooking all day

 

[jod0565]

I try never to do the solo monkey dance on Christmas day. I know He's watching.

 

[Death_blooms08]

I try never to do the solo monkey dance on Christmas day. I know He's watching.

They are all watching, thats why the tooth fairy put rabbit shit under my pillow, the boogyman pissed in my boots, santa jacked off in my stocking, the easter bunny slapped my grandma, cupid tried to get me with a poison tipped arrow, and that little green druken bastard tried to finger my sister. Its a damn fairy tale conspiracy.

 

[member2686]

OMG death blooms, that was fuckin' hilarious!!! :1orglaugh :rofl: :rofl2:

 

[poggy]

What have I started? Just kidding. Can't criticise him for his honesty.

Let's bring this thread back to the original topic.

I've still got Nina Mercedez on the brain - or should that be in my trousers?

I think I need to put one of her DVDs on....

After this what's your next post links to the pictures of you doing it:scream::eek: