I have told him without screaming or throwing a fit, I sat him down to talk to him about it and he would just say "I'm sorry, I really didn't realize that, I just don't know what else to do." We have watched porno together and that worked for a while, he was all over me because he was dying to do that with me for so long, but it was still all about him. He has always lasted a decent time while we fuck, which it gets me off, but its always me touching him, me jacking him off, or anything involving getting him turned on, or getting him off, its always him. Maybe it is just me. I'm not sure, it is just so frustrating, I had even gotten to the point to just act like I don't want it just so I can see if he will try something, it works for a bit, but then it just drifts off again. I have big tits, a nice ass, a good mouth for dick sucking, and have been told I can work magic with my fingers (by him and a few other partners I've had in the past) so how is it that I can't get what I want! I take care of him anyway I can. Hell, its a turn on for me to suck him off or jack him off, but... when is it my turn? I'll eventually get a pic of me up here just to see if anyone else could thinks its my looks thats turning him off
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Why is wanting sex all the time a turn off to my man
- Thread starter brwn_eyed_grl
- Start date
I tried to edit my post but the time expired before I could edit it
Just in the past few months after 15 years of being together it finally clicked to him that it really was important to me. Since then he has made it a priority to have sex almost daily, sometimes every other day, but never less. Prior to that he could easily go for a few weeks and not realize it had been that long until I brough it up.
It's not that he doesn't enjoy sex. It mostly just that he puts so much stress on himself with work and providing for our family that by the time we make it to bed at night he is just give out and instead of thinking doing it his mind is already on the next day's work.
I have a handful of friends who are in the same place where they have a much higher sex drive then their hubby's. So it's not as uncommon as you would think. It's just what guy would talk about it, and if a women admits that she isn't having to constantly fake headaches and turn her guy down then people automaticaly jump to the conclusion that her hubby is cheating.
So there you go... my for what they are worth. lol (how's that for a first post...)
Best thing I could of read all night. He does stress quite a bit, working for me and our daughter is hard, and I do contribute to keep him from having to stress so much, I baby him all the time, (he is a needy man) which is just what I like to do, I baby him, take care of him, rub him down after a hard days work, cook, clean, and run my own house cleaning business to contribute to our finances, I would just like it to be my turn. It its just really frustrating to feel like the man I love doesn't want me. We have sat down and talked about it, no fighting or screaming, he seemed to understand, but it still hurts when he turns me down more often then not. I have good tits, a good ass and a good dick sucking mouth, so it just sucks whenever he has told me these things in the past that what I had was such a turn on to him, seems to not work. I feel so worthless whenever I want it all the time and he just wants to be left alone. I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one feeling like this. I know he isn't cheating, and I have never cheated on him, maybe it is a phase, I just wish I didn't want it all the time so I wouldn't feel so unloved every time I do get turned down by him. I'll eventually get a pic up so people can see if it is how I look that no longer gets him going
Just in the past few months after 15 years of being together it finally clicked to him that it really was important to me. Since then he has made it a priority to have sex almost daily, sometimes every other day, but never less. Prior to that he could easily go for a few weeks and not realize it had been that long until I brough it up.
It's not that he doesn't enjoy sex. It mostly just that he puts so much stress on himself with work and providing for our family that by the time we make it to bed at night he is just give out and instead of thinking doing it his mind is already on the next day's work.
I have a handful of friends who are in the same place where they have a much higher sex drive then their hubby's. So it's not as uncommon as you would think. It's just what guy would talk about it, and if a women admits that she isn't having to constantly fake headaches and turn her guy down then people automaticaly jump to the conclusion that her hubby is cheating.
So there you go... my for what they are worth. lol (how's that for a first post...)
Best thing I could of read all night. He does stress quite a bit, working for me and our daughter is hard, and I do contribute to keep him from having to stress so much, I baby him all the time, (he is a needy man) which is just what I like to do, I baby him, take care of him, rub him down after a hard days work, cook, clean, and run my own house cleaning business to contribute to our finances, I would just like it to be my turn. It its just really frustrating to feel like the man I love doesn't want me. We have sat down and talked about it, no fighting or screaming, he seemed to understand, but it still hurts when he turns me down more often then not. I have good tits, a good ass and a good dick sucking mouth, so it just sucks whenever he has told me these things in the past that what I had was such a turn on to him, seems to not work. I feel so worthless whenever I want it all the time and he just wants to be left alone. I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one feeling like this. I know he isn't cheating, and I have never cheated on him, maybe it is a phase, I just wish I didn't want it all the time so I wouldn't feel so unloved every time I do get turned down by him. I'll eventually get a pic up so people can see if it is how I look that no longer gets him going
Well sure thing big boy...but I don't want you gettin' fired. Daddy needs a PS3 this holiday season....
:yesyes:
I give my best advice when I have a nice pair of tits to look at....:angels::glugglug::thumbsup:
maildude
Postal Paranoiac
Sex is the icing. But love is the sustenance. I know this sounds corny, but I am over 40 and therefore have a Corniness Permit. Take it from a much older and experienced dude: If a guy really cares for you and loves you, sex is not enough. Sex is the easy part. He wants all of you. That means devotion, time, tolerance and most of all sacrifice. Giving your guy sex without limits just feeds into ONE of his wishes. On the other hand, if sex is all he wants, he'll ditch you fairly quickly. The fact that he hasn't yet lends credence to my first point. Maybe slowing down and addressing his deeper needs is the way to go.
Ok, I can totally agree with this one right here. I was working two jobs and barely getting time for sleep but my ex wanted it far more than I had the energy or drive to give. When a guy has alot on his mind it's just really difficult to get things goin
ChefChiTown
The secret ingredient? MY BALLS
Don't take this the wrong way, but maybe he thinks you're a slut. And, allow me to explain myself...
If a girl wants sex and wants it aaaaall the time, a lot of guys associate that with being a slut. Whether you have slept with a lot of other guys besides your current boyfriend or not, your boyfriend just might be thinking that your sex drive has led you to sleep with a lot of other dudes. And, that might be turning him off.
:2 cents:
JayJohn85
Banned
Man you only think like that if your not getting any at the moment. I'm 25 and truth be told the whole 3 times a day thing does get old and you would be tired from working and shit. Shag too much it also loses its appeal. Hey I read somewhere porn stars dont have sex before a shoot. I would wager this is one of the various reasons for that.
I'd say that yes he is stressed and things are rough. But I'd like to point out that you said you guys are still doing it, but the real problem in it is that you are always the initiator. Which i can see how that's a problem, and maybe you guys should talk about that. Cause the idea seems to be that if he rocked your world in the foreplay you'd feel more attractive and that the sex and everything would improve.
ALL the time is a strong statement.
Every man has a recharge period. Some men recharge faster than others. That's nothing against a man's manhood, its just life. Women don't have this same recharge period. Some claim to, but that's just fatigue. There's a big difference in fatigue and a man's recharge period. (Remember, if a Viagara user has an erection for 4 hours, they have to call 911 cause too much erection can actually cause you to lose it all together)
To have a woman who wants sex ALL the time (if all the time really is ALL the time), its near impossible for any man (even Peter North & Lexington Steel) to keep up with "ALL the time." Then that brings up the question "so where else will she be getting it from?"
A woman wanting all the time gives a man (who wants to be the only one) no sense of security. Lack of a sense of security can and often does translate into a turn off.
He's not saying he doesn't like that you want it so often, but when that wanting becomes SO often that its damn near impossible for 1 man to keep up with, and he wants to be the only one, then he's saying your appetite gives him no reason to believe he's the only or enough.
If you always cook for your man, but after he eats, he's always still craving some food, you'd assume your cooking didn't quite hit the spot no matter how good it was. Then when you inevitably run out of food to cook until next grocery run, you're gonna wonder where else is he eating. May even make you not feel like cooking for Mr. Bottomless pit as much anymore cause you already know your cooking doesn't hit the spot for him
Every man has a recharge period. Some men recharge faster than others. That's nothing against a man's manhood, its just life. Women don't have this same recharge period. Some claim to, but that's just fatigue. There's a big difference in fatigue and a man's recharge period. (Remember, if a Viagara user has an erection for 4 hours, they have to call 911 cause too much erection can actually cause you to lose it all together)
To have a woman who wants sex ALL the time (if all the time really is ALL the time), its near impossible for any man (even Peter North & Lexington Steel) to keep up with "ALL the time." Then that brings up the question "so where else will she be getting it from?"
A woman wanting all the time gives a man (who wants to be the only one) no sense of security. Lack of a sense of security can and often does translate into a turn off.
He's not saying he doesn't like that you want it so often, but when that wanting becomes SO often that its damn near impossible for 1 man to keep up with, and he wants to be the only one, then he's saying your appetite gives him no reason to believe he's the only or enough.
If you always cook for your man, but after he eats, he's always still craving some food, you'd assume your cooking didn't quite hit the spot no matter how good it was. Then when you inevitably run out of food to cook until next grocery run, you're gonna wonder where else is he eating. May even make you not feel like cooking for Mr. Bottomless pit as much anymore cause you already know your cooking doesn't hit the spot for him
Have you considered that perhaps you may have an addiction? If you're upset about getting it less than every forty eight hours, then (and I say this honestly and with all respect) the problem may be with you. Your man could be stressed, or he might not be, but he's putting out at least every other day, which is a rather good helping of the ol' in/out. He is a human being, not a machine, remember. I'd suggest getting some toys and enjoying the pleasure of filling the gaps (pun intended) yourself. You may even realize that you prefer it that way!
Maybe he just wants to be the pursuer?
Perhaps you could pretend to be cold and uninterested?
He might just have a "dominant" thing going and it messes up his psyche when you assume that role?
Just a guess of course.
Good luck to you both,
~HB
Perhaps you could pretend to be cold and uninterested?
He might just have a "dominant" thing going and it messes up his psyche when you assume that role?
Just a guess of course.
Good luck to you both,
~HB
Maybe he just ran out of juice...
I used to want to rail my girl all the time and it was sometimes the other way around. But I can see that; a guy really has to put in a lot of work in sex - the female just has to spread their legs. It's easy for them. I used to get worn the F down after like 10-15 minutes because I was out of shape, but I always stayed hard as a rock no matter what. I usually stopped after she started to dry up down there and it got a little too rough.
It's pretty simple...you can be the most gorgeous woman ever....if you're jumping your man every five minutes...he will lose interest a little. Men enjoy the chase at least every once in a while. It's our nature and you taking the wild out of the tiger..(no pun honestly...yea I could have said lion but what fun would that have been?).
That girl is poison!!!
HE1FiNEARTiST
Banned
seems like the fire has turned off in your relationship. dont know if somebody has told you already but maybe you should be an adult and ask him straight up.
Wainkerr99
Closed Account
Is he a Piscean? They can be a bit cool sometimes: sex once or twice a week and all that. Sounds like it could be stress, though, and important other things. I could be cynical and say welcome to marriage, but, it sounds like you really make more than an effort from your part.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFXcHD0z3ZY
I would suggest taking it in parts. For a few weeks do this part, something that interests you. Then, try the romance again for a week or two, then focus on something else again, like cycles, until you can reconcile and blend the various parts. Hope I am making sense.
You have a life too you know.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFXcHD0z3ZY
I would suggest taking it in parts. For a few weeks do this part, something that interests you. Then, try the romance again for a week or two, then focus on something else again, like cycles, until you can reconcile and blend the various parts. Hope I am making sense.
You have a life too you know.
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