Trying to "quit" masturbation?

[Fully loaded]

Perhaps I'm barking up the wrong tree posting this on Freeones but I was wondering if anyone else has ever tried to quit masturbating? Emphasis on the word tried.

It's not that I think there's anything wrong, per se, with masturbation. I don't believe I'm going to hell for doing the knuckle shuffle (...at least I hope not!). Rather that I've reached the point where it's become a bad habit. After I've finished the deed, I end up feeling cheap and nasty because I know I'm using masturbation as a substitute for a sexlife. The last time I had sex was over three years ago and it seems that everyone is getting some but me. So to help my self-esteem, I try to abstain from jerking off for as long as possible. It kinda works for awhile, only I have to give in sooner or later when I'm sexually frustrated and need to fap. I've also tried limiting myself to say, once or twice a week, but that never goes to plan. So as you can see, it's nothing but a vicious cycle. I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't.

Can anyone relate?

 

[Johan]

I'm using masturbation as a substitute for a sexlife. The last time I had sex was over three years ago

:eek:
3 fucking years without gettind laid ! Did you became a monk or what ?

 

[TomJolly]

Make it your goal to make it till this time next week without 'touching yourself' if you can do it, reward yourself. Either that, or man up and get some pussy bro

 

[GodsEmbryo]

... After I've finished the deed, I end up feeling cheap and nasty because I know I'm using masturbation as a substitute for a sexlife...

Why would you see wanking as a substitute for a sexlife??? Does this mean you would never ever masturbate if you had a girlfriend? Or find your girlfriend weird if she did?
Wanking is just releasing some sexual tension. And I don't think it really helps if you run around with blue balls and a frustrated look when approaching a girl.

 

[Tittyman5000]

Dude don't worry bout it, when it happens it happens, its like taking a leak, you need to do it than do it, the longer you wait the more its gonna build up and you'll have to even worse. I'll put it this way, I get pussy all the time. I have a steady GF a side piece mistress and booty call bitch if needed, yet I still have time to throw a poon! Dammit I never realized that till now? :dunno: LOL Anyways, its just us guys love bitches! Titties & Ass! Plus its even better to not have to pay for dinner, flowers, jewelry and of course the inevitable BABIES...

 

[Deepcover]

If I want some pussy I just go to the strip club. I've never fucked a normal girl (who doesn't escort or strip) before, otherwise I'd still be a virgin till this day. Maybe you suffer from social anxiety disorder. Could that be the reason?

 

[Fully loaded]

:eek:
3 fucking years without gettind laid ! Did you became a monk or what ?

Yiu Mo Gwai Gwaai Fai Di Zao! Yiu Mo Gwai Gwaai Fai Di Zao!

Make it your goal to make it till this time next week without 'touching yourself' if you can do it, reward yourself. Either that, or man up and get some pussy bro

Well I'm already up to a week. Striving to make it two at the least.

Why would you see wanking as a substitute for a sexlife???

Because I don't have one? So horniness that would otherwise be spent on having sex is spent jerking off.

Does this mean you would never ever masturbate if you had a girlfriend? Or find your girlfriend weird if she did?

Of course I'd masturbate, but I'd be having the best of both worlds.

Wanking is just releasing some sexual tension. And I don't think it really helps if you run around with blue balls and a frustrated look when approaching a girl.

I don't know about that. I feel worse about myself physically and emotionally if I jerk off a lot, whereas if I don't my body is telling me to go out and get jiggy. Not that it makes much difference.

If I want some pussy I just go to the strip club. I've never fucked a normal girl (who doesn't escort or strip) before, otherwise I'd still be a virgin till this day. Maybe you suffer from social anxiety disorder. Could that be the reason?

One problem I have is that I'm recovering from "oneitis". I was crazy in love with my last girlfriend, she was amazing, had a body to die for, and I'm only just starting to get over it. But during that time I just haven't met anyone or had any kinda luck with the ladies. Which fucking sucks. Especially when people like my friend have girls falling into their lap. Maybe it's just one of those things I have to accept. That for whatever reason women aren't attracted to me.

 

[Luxman]

I usually masturbated 1~3 hours before a date or before I know I am going to have sex with my girlfriend, about 3 to 6 times per month, and I masturbate almost every other day of the month.
It relaxes you and you pay more attention to her face than her boobs, which improves the chances of having sex.
Also if you do have sex, it allows you to perform longer.
I used to feel guilty masturbating when I was a teenager, but by my early 20's I just enjoyed it whenever I felt like it without any guilt.
Just don't do it in public or at work, only do it at home.

 

[JasonCook78]

Just don't do it in public or at work, only do it at home.

I masturbated on an airplane and it was awesome.

 

[luis1972]

Why to leave a great pleasure?

 

[DOA82]

Everyone masturbates, its natural, its normal and it is in no way harmful.

Unless you are rubbing yourself raw, or using a questionable form of stimuli, why abstain from something which is as normal in human nature as breathing.

You are using it for comfort instead of what its meant for, something to make you feel good. Medically its good for you, so again I have to ask, why stop at all?

Okay so you haven't had sex in 3 years, why not? What are you doing to change that? Dont sir around and feel sorry for yourself, or use masturbation as an excuse not to improve your situation. If something feels good and has no harmful side affects, have at it, yank that crank!

 

[Fully loaded]

Okay so you haven't had sex in 3 years, why not? What are you doing to change that? Dont sir around and feel sorry for yourself, or use masturbation as an excuse not to improve your situation.

Dude, it doesn't matter what I do. I've tried to be a more outgoing person and women are still not attracted to me - not the right women, at least. Wouldn't be so bad if I didn't look at some of the goons that girls are going out with. Makes you really wonder where you're going wrong. At 23, I told myself I was still young and would find someone else. Then at 24, I did the same, then 25... then 26... I'll be 27 in six months and the stark reality of being foreveralone becomes clearer by the day.

And please don't suggest any PUA crap. I wouldn't go down that route even if I could.

 

[Captaingault]

I 'm almost 30 yo man, still a virgin.
Discovered it "late" 18.
Tried to quit masturbation for 11 years, but every time I see a woman in tight light blue jeans I get a boner.
My penis isn't that big 7.5 inches any help?
Plese no girlfriends I cannot afford that with 500$ salary

 

[DP_LOVER]

theres nothing wrong with jerking off, its part of life. It starts to become a problem when it takes over your life and you start spending more time jerking off than with friends and family in the real world. Dont look at it as the reason that you are not getting laid, or think that you are somehow a bad person because of it. Like everything, its fine in moderation, just dont got crazy.

Also as a side not, i was similar to you and was pretty much permanently single until my late 20's, i had been with plenty of girls but couldnt seem to get a serious girlfriend. I used to think i would be the guy buying meals for one for the rest of my life, but when i was least expecting it i met someone and we have been happy together for over 2 years now. It sounds cliche but you can meet someone when you least expect it, dont try too hard and your time will come. In the mean time, by all means try to reduce the amount a time you spend wanking if you feel that it is becoming excessive, but dont deny yourself something that gives you pleasure.

 

[Captaingault]

Thanks man but i really do not know how to properly masturbate so the "feeling" is just 3 to 6 seconds and then the guilty going to hell feelings

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

Can anyone relate?

Somewhat, yes.

Don't worry about anyone replying telling you how much "pussy" they get or how satisfied with their sex life they are. Either now or at some point they've been so into porn/their masturbatory lives as to sign up and get an account here to begin with, which whether we like it or not is not normal, compared to just firing up some porn when you feel the need, doing the deed then carrying on with life. During my own last relationship, when I actually *was* satisfied with my sex life, I never watched porn, and certainly never went on any forums or yahoo groups to talk to a bunch of strangers about porn. It's a very strange defence mechanism that makes people need, even under the veil of anonymity the Internet provides, to espouse that "yeah I watch porn and have favourite pornstars. But I'm ALWAYS fucking, me." Sure you are. Well, unless you've got sex addiction to the point where your free time away from your highly satisfying sex life has to spent on here. Which would be worrying.

For yourself Fully loaded, there is nothing wrong with a healthy masturbatory life and making it your favourite hobby as something to do when you're by yourself. Just ask yourself some questions :

1) Do you ever turn down invitations to real-life social activities because you want to stay in masturbating?
2) Do you ever go to a gathering or event but find yourself going home early to masturbate?
3) Does it affect your work, i.e. do you go to work tired because you didn't sleep enough because you stayed up masturbating?
4) Do you find yourself constantly on your computer for no other reason than to find material to masturbate to?
5) Do you find yourself spending money you can't afford to on porn?

If the answer to any of these is yes, then You Might have a problem, because it's affecting your life in a negative manner. Don't get hung up on masturbating as a "substitute for a sexlife" as by definition that's exactly what it is, even as a temporary measure. In THAT moment, we masturbate because we want sex and it isn't available. That doesn't matter whether it's because a regular partner isn't available or because we don't have a partner. What matters is that masturbating is a part of your life but isn't taking over your life.

 

[DOA82]

Whats PUA?

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

Whats PUA?

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=PUA

 

[TaylorVixenFan]

well personally for me masturbation is the closest ill ever get to sex....im the ugliest bastard alive and ill never get any...i mean lets get real im 24 and still a virgin. if fate wanted me to have sex it would have let me along time ago

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

well personally for me masturbation is the closest ill ever get to sex....im the ugliest bastard alive and ill never get any...i mean lets get real im 24 and still a virgin. if fate wanted me to have sex it would have let me along time ago

Don't feel like that. I was approaching my 24th birthday when I lost my V-plates. I let insecurity get the better of me a lot of the time as I didnt think I'm good looking and certainly wasn't slim. But I met a girl who made it clear she thought I was wonderful (yes, personality matters) and after three weeks of dating a few false starts she took my cherry. We had a great relationship for four years after that. It's only when I stopped looking that I found it.