Things You Do On Purpose Just To Be A Prick

[Cpt.Obvious]

Person: - "Hi".
Me: "No just over tired".

Person: "What's Up".
Me: A direction, the opposite of down, an illusion created by gravity.

Person: "What Time is it"?
Me: "Summer Time".

Person: "you some kind of asshole"?
Me: "no, but I have one, otherwise I would be dead". (I know I'm tempting fate with that one).

 

[sean miguel]

I don't do anything on purpose to be a prick; it's just my inclination.

"I'm sorry, you were speaking to me then stopped and now are looking at me as if waiting for me to say something?"

 

[RJS13]

Sometimes to piss off an ex I had I'd go a week without jizzing saving up days worth of rancid nut in my testicles. She knew how much I liked blow jobs so I'd eat tons if cabbage, asparagus and coffee everyday. Then about the time I could start to smell the stench of rotten cabbage oozing from my pores it was time for a BJ I can't put into words how her face looked as she was dry heaving with a mouthful of my green, bitter, cabbage flavored love sauce. Good times

 

[Petra]

I have some friends that are pretty tall (like the dutch are) and they mooch rides all the time. Whomever did the city planning in the city we live in has/had a love affair with speed bumps. So sometimes if one is sitting in the middle of the back seat I may just hit a speed bump a little faster than usual.

 

[Little Red Wagon Repairman]

The second time I visited Lemon Drop I asked her for a senior discount. I figured since she was over 65 she should lower her rates.

 

[xfire]

Things You Do On Purpose Just To Be A Prick

Show up, that's enough to infuriate some dumb motherfuckers.