India is employing trained langur monkeys to patrol the grounds of the Commonwealth Games and to scare away any stray primates from bothering the humans.
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Alrite. So there's these litle moonkey fellers, right, and what they've doone, they've given them a litle 'at and a badge, and they see people causing trooble, an' they say "righto, 'op it you fellers"...... but the problem is now they've started checkin ID's, and soome of them athletes are ********, y'know... so thing are gettin' a bit 'airy...