Yeah.. but you're a 35 year old married professional. Age, profession, marriage.. they all lend a bit extra width to that thin line of what you can and cant do with coworkers.
Utter bullshit! In fact, it's far worse!
When I was a college intern, I got away with a crapload that would get me fired today.
What I know now almost twice my age is tact and approach, but nothing else.
Hell, in just the last year I had someone say I was an old, fat pervert by just trying to make a teenager feel good about herself.
I've had one woman get all pissy in the because she overheard only part of a conversation about my testicle cancer scare which I was sharing to a guy who was going through the initial portions of the uncomfortable testing.
I cant speak for psych.. but being single, 25 and not-quite-a-professional if you were to look at my resume`.... even the most sterile jokes or appreciative glances can.. and sometimes do.. get called out and mentioned to the supervisor.
Well, you must be really pushing it then.
I just know I haven't pulled the type of stuff being mentioned here.
The only time I've done stuff at work when I was your age is when I had the consent of the woman, an executive who would easily outrank me.
There were a couple of "social incidents" outside of work, but the women involved were already marked at social basket cases -- of which I was proving that point, not trying to get in their pants.
Extreme paranoia from the 20 somethings I've worked with on the nice side of town. They describe every other guy as a creep or creepy for the simplest of quirks they exhibit. For being in a rich area where absolutely nothing bad will ever happen to them, they sure believe that kidnappings and murders can and will happen anywhere.. anytime.. from any male figure.. (dumbasses)
There are women I avoid because they are such, and that's saved me.
I've never wanted to "fuck the mean bitch" or "give her what she deserves," just not worth it in the least bit.
In fact, guys would make fun of me -- and even some girls -- for treating even the alleged "biggest bitches" as ladies and never call them a "bitch."
But that didn't mean I hung around or dealt with them if I didn't have to -- I'll be nice, but I'm not signing myself up for punishment.
If a woman took issue with something just because she wanted to take issue, she didn't see me ever again if I could help it.
I've had too many women, even when I wasn't saying anything sexual, totally take something wrong.
One time I was talking male-female ST connectors for fibre (this is mid '90s so it wasn't common even among anyone in IT) on the phone and one woman said "I know what you're talking about and you had better stop it."
She hung up my phone when I didn't stop and it took me several times to prove I wasn't talking "in code" to my buddy, but a storage vendor.
Another time I liked this woman (looked like Deborah Winger IIRC) when I was a waiter (the only non-office job I ever had, it was great money and fun) and one day she just started bitching about my hanging around her.
It was loud enough others took note and I finally just shot it back, "well why don't you complain about my infatuation was 'harassment' then?"
She answered, "well maybe I will!"
And all I said is, "then you don't have to worry about me bothering you again."
I realized later that she was really upset that day, and the last thing she wanted was the flirty guy bothering her, trying to make her happy like I usually did.
But at the same time, because she "pulled that trigger," I couldn't talk to her any more.
She apologized the next day, and not only did I just walk away, but I made sure our schedules didn't cross.
She later admitted to others that she missed hanging out with me both during and after work, but one of our mutual female friends told her that she had "crossed the line" that broke that friendship.
Oftentimes I lived back on the east side of Indy where it isnt impossible to get robbed or mugged after midnight but the chicks were so laidback despite it all. No worries except making the rent. And buying cigs. Or getting pregnant. Again. (Note to self: find a trailer park chick)
Coincidentally enough, there are a lot of full figured "trailer park types" that don't smoke (thank God).
Put them into some elegant clothes (which is not hard to do with some thrifty spending) and change their view and they will love you.
Most of the thinner trailer park trash do look like trash regardless (and the smoking keeps their weight down), so I never touched those.
Just make sure not to get caught. Public indecency doesnt look good on a criminal record. And dont exit the restroom while your face is still flushed from post-orgasmic euphoria.
There is indecency when "fooling around with your girlfriend" that is consensual with the woman, and then the type that is non-consensual and could even be a serious sexual predator mark.
Yes, they stretch it that far sometimes and its a huge, huge difference!
This is all good advice, but none is better than what I'm about to give.
Go to the bathroom and do a quick jerk.
No shit. Not only will you NOT have to urge to ruin your job, you'll feel great after too.
Go to a private bathroom
off-site (preferably the one in your own home).
You can get quite easily terminated for spanking in the company bathrooms and the same marks as a possible "issue."
