Ay y'all. I am on this funny ass text site just reading ! I'm laughing so much my blunt keeps going out...
Here are some of the gems...
(612): So do you want to come over?
(763): Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
(630): That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Replies (8) Good Night (79) Bad Night (1241) More from 630
(720): Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
(303): I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
(408): When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
(415): She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
(206): I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
(757): Come on the kid is gayer than me
(757): Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
(510): dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
(704): I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Replies (5) Good Night (64) Bad Night (1502) More from 704
(713): I looked at my own cervix.
Replies (30) Good Night (297) Bad Night (1578) More from 713
(951): Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
(951): Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Replies (22) Good Night (734) Bad Night (1314) More from 951
(210): cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
This shit is hilarious.....:scream:
Here are some of the gems...
(612): So do you want to come over?
(763): Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
(630): That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Replies (8) Good Night (79) Bad Night (1241) More from 630
(720): Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
(303): I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
(408): When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
(415): She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
(206): I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
(757): Come on the kid is gayer than me
(757): Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
(510): dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
(704): I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Replies (5) Good Night (64) Bad Night (1502) More from 704
(713): I looked at my own cervix.
Replies (30) Good Night (297) Bad Night (1578) More from 713
(951): Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
(951): Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Replies (22) Good Night (734) Bad Night (1314) More from 951
(210): cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
This shit is hilarious.....:scream:
