Girlfriend hates my edging and jacking

[D-rock]

I learned something today.

I almost wish I hadn't on this thread.

 

[Rane1071]

As Nina Van-Horn (Just Shoot Me) says "I'm the last person to give advice. Or take it. .... Or pay for a round of drinks".

 

[grower_boy]

Why does she **** masturbation? That seems like a petty thing to get upset over.

 

[betagammapi]

Yeah, seriously. My wife and I haven't had sex in three months (yes, that's how bad it can get) but at least she doesn't complain when I jack off to a good movie or picture set and she walks in on me. If she is going to complain about you taking care of yourself, and she won't do it for you either, than you need to sit down with her and have a honest chat about your sex life.

 

[bigskeeter]

1. your girl gets bored with you
2. she goes out and finds the sex she wants
3. you jack and edge all over your own face waiting for her to return home
4. she returns home and then bitches at you for jacking again

 

[JacknCoke]

^ You happen to be the best example why it is wise the original poster here should fuck and chuck his girlfriend before it's too late and he ends up raising a chump such as yourself

:wtf:

 

[sumoftheexcess]

What you should do is start making holes in watermelons, and fucking them. Be sure to leave the melon on the counter afterwards, and be bold to explain what the hole is. This solves a number of problems:

1. You're technically not pleasing yourself. Your bitch watermelon is.
2. You're fucking something else, but not cheating.
3. You always have have plenty of tasty watermelon around to eat.

1. What should the internal temperature of the watermelon be?
2. Drop load inside watermelon or on top? (Would need at least 2 watermelons)
3. Would it be acceptable to serve her the watermelon after said jacking?

:1orglaugh