Getting Your Heart Broken

[Jack Davenport]

............anybody but you Ice, and I'd be going to town on this thread.

Dollars to donuts somebody is going to town on his ex right at this moment.

 

[Straight Shooter]

Oi! Have you tried calling or physically visiting her to talk? That's a much more accurate way to tell what's going on than by text messages. As I said earlier, she could just be out of text messages for this billing cycle. Grow a pair and confront her face to face instead of sulking over a series of Is and Os.

I don't want to be that guy that just shows up like that. When your number gets blocked, it's clear that for some reason that that person doesn't want to talk to you. I can take a message. I'm hoping that she's having phone trouble like you mentioned earlier so I'm going to wait a little to see if she reaches out. If not, I'm just move one then.

Dollars to donuts somebody is going to town on his ex right at this moment.

She doesn't go to ND lol. And we weren't officially in a relationship but it was progressing to that point because we both finally made our feelings known to each other. That we could see ourselves being more than just friends

 

[bobjustbob]

It's kind of hard to judge what kind of relationship you were both in. If you were romantic or just friends do this. Send flowers to her work place. On the card put your number. She may have lost your phone number, nothing more. She reads the card and your number. If for anything, you have made contact and the ball is in her court. Flowers showing up at a woman's desk is the sweatiest thing a man can do for a woman. Other workers will see it and that will build her ego/break her down. If you never hear from her again then you know of her decision. Move on and let her go. That will be both of your last memories of each other.

 

[Mr. Daystar]

i've said it once, and a million times. texting is evil. especially with a potential love interest.

its never conversation you would really have face to face, and tones cannot be determined, no matter how many winky faces you type.

NEVER, and I mean NEVER use texting for anything more then asking your partner to pick something up from the store...and even then, say please and thank you. Inflection is the most important thing in a conversation.

I'm sorry you're having love troubles dude...but there is no substitute for the spoken word. I would say your best choice, is to send her a card, and explain you are dumbfounded at her sudden change of heart, and ask her the reason. If she tells you, it was something you texted her, ask her if you can talk it out, it's just a big misunderstanding. If she tells you to leave her alone, walk away, and take the time you need to get over her, but drop it, and move on. Do not chase her, if she doesn't want to be chased.

Good luck, and I hope you resolve this, and can find happiness with this girl.

 

[Mr. Daystar]

............anybody but you Ice, and I'd be going to town on this thread.

I hope you get this resolved and this is just a misunderstanding.

The restraint that I'm showing right now. My God but I am one impressive motherfucker.

Yep, The Nobel prize for humanitarianism is comin' your way holmes...

 

[Straight Shooter]

NEVER, and I mean NEVER use texting for anything more then asking your partner to pick something up from the store...and even then, say please and thank you. Inflection is the most important thing in a conversation.

I'm sorry you're having love troubles dude...but there is no substitute for the spoken word. I would say your best choice, is to send her a card, and explain you are dumbfounded at her sudden change of heart, and ask her the reason. If she tells you, it was something you texted her, ask her if you can talk it out, it's just a big misunderstanding. If she tells you to leave her alone, walk away, and take the time you need to get over her, but drop it, and move on. Do not chase her, if she doesn't want to be chased.

Good luck, and I hope you resolve this, and can find happiness with this girl.

I'm going to give her until the end of the month, because like GSB said maybe she's out of texts and if that's the case she has my number and can contact me and she also knows where she can find me. If I don't hear from her by the end of the month then I'm going to move on

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

And we weren't officially in a relationship but it was progressing to that point because we both finally made our feelings known to each other. That we could see ourselves being more than just friends

Wait, hang on.... I think I got the wrong end of the stick here.

I was kicking it with this girl for more than a year and we had a great relationship.

Sorry, from this sentence and the phrase "heart broken" I thought we were talking about an out-of-the-blue ending to an actual relationship. You've text a lot, it sounds like. Have you dated properly - gone out just the pair of you of an evening, spent quality time together, got to know each other face to face? Gone on a date when you both knew it was a date? Have you slept together even once?

Sounds like the stage you're at now is "rejection" rather than a relationship ending. Tell me if I'm wrong, dude. If this is the case, forget about her and move on. I'm sure she's really nice and you get on, but there are LOADS of women out there that are really nice that you'll get on with, and you're 23. You're in your fucking prime. If something's dead, move on. Try plenty of girls out while you can. Remember SWSWSWN - Some Will, Some Won't, So What? Next.

Get yourself a decent support network in case your heart gets truly broken some day. When someone you are in love with and that you think is in love with you just brings your whole world crashing down. You seem a nice chap so I hope it doesn't happen and the next relationship - real relationship - turns out to be "the one", but make sure you know who you'd turn to just in case. Because a truly broken heart is one of the worst things you'll ever know, when you'll sit in a crowded room and feel alone, when you'll sit in an empty room deafened by the silence, stare blankly into the wall and wonder how on Earth you can even go on. Know who you'd pick up the phone to, should that ever befall you. You'll be fucking glad you did.

 

[maildude]

I've often said: I'll take a hard knee in the balls ten times over having my heart broken again.

 

[Straight Shooter]

Wait, hang on.... I think I got the wrong end of the stick here.



Sorry, from this sentence and the phrase "heart broken" I thought we were talking about an out-of-the-blue ending to an actual relationship. You've text a lot, it sounds like. Have you dated properly - gone out just the pair of you of an evening, spent quality time together, got to know each other face to face? Gone on a date when you both knew it was a date? Have you slept together even once?

Sounds like the stage you're at now is "rejection" rather than a relationship ending. Tell me if I'm wrong, dude. If this is the case, forget about her and move on. I'm sure she's really nice and you get on, but there are LOADS of women out there that are really nice that you'll get on with, and you're 23. You're in your fucking prime. If something's dead, move on. Try plenty of girls out while you can. Remember SWSWSWN - Some Will, Some Won't, So What? Next.

Get yourself a decent support network in case your heart gets truly broken some day. When someone you are in love with and that you think is in love with you just brings your whole world crashing down. You seem a nice chap so I hope it doesn't happen and the next relationship - real relationship - turns out to be "the one", but make sure you know who you'd turn to just in case. Because a truly broken heart is one of the worst things you'll ever know, when you'll sit in a crowded room and feel alone, when you'll sit in an empty room deafened by the silence, stare blankly into the wall and wonder how on Earth you can even go on. Know who you'd pick up the phone to, should that ever befall you. You'll be fucking glad you did.

Yes

 

[Mayhem]

I'm going to give her until the end of the month, because like GSB said maybe she's out of texts and if that's the case she has my number and can contact me and she also knows where she can find me. If I don't hear from her by the end of the month then I'm going to move on

What are the possibilities that she's where she's at wondering why you won't call, if she's something that is so easily forgotten, and what the fuck is up with that volleyball scene with you and Mav and Goose?

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

Yes

But not the rest? Dinner and a movie followed by "everything but" on the sofa, even if things didn't go all the way? Not even a quick upstairs-downstairs? Unless it turns out one of these "phone disconnected/lost number/billing cycle" things turns out to be the case. all you've lost is the hope that a girl you've hung around with that you wanted to be dating, would date you. If you've hit the wall with this lass, go out with your mates at the weekend, get trashed, move on. :beer:

Flowers showing up at a woman's desk is the sweatiest thing a man can do for a woman.

Not the word I'm guessing you were going for, bobs.

And sure, some women would like that. Some other women, especially women you aren't actually involved with yet, and especially if they were cutting you off because they thought you were needy, clingy or possessive, would find such an extroverted display needy, clingy or possessive.

Not that I'm saying that's you, Iceman. Just sounds like for whatever reason she's blocked you because she's too cowardly to tell you what's up. Maybe she's started seeing someone and neither wanted to upset you by telling you, or to receive the distraction of your messages. I dunno. If it's been two weeks, the ball is pretty much in her court. I'd say any actions you take now would mark you down as needy, clingy or possessive. Or stalkerish.

Leave it another two weeks so you know it isn't some billing cycle/technical fuck-up, and when you've accepted she's jerked you around for no apparent reason and didn't have the guts to tell you why, you'll realize you can do better. SWSWSWN.

 

[bobjustbob]

Stiffy, flowers at the desk of a woman are the sweatiest thing. Always an,"awe... look at that." Women, chime in here, doesn't that just melt your heart? It's called romance. Women love romance. It's their weakness. You can't do that with a text. It's not like you're showing up at her door. It's just 20 bucks charged over the Internet. The flower guy shows up and asks for her. If she isn't there they are sure to find her. Her decision is made right there and then. If you don't get a call back in 2 days then it's over. Write off your $20 and don't think about her anymore. Continue to live your life. It's cheaper than going to a titty bar to wallow in your sorrows so don't follow that path.


Is this what I've been missing in the relationship market? Texting rather than hearing a voice on the phone? Sorry, I'd rather punch 10 numbers into a phone once and then talk the rest of my way through. It's nicer hearing a woman say good night than reading it.

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

Again with the sweatiest! You got perspiration problems, bobs?

And yeah, flowers are great if they're welcome. Romance in general is great, if it's from a welcome source. If it's not, it can be a tipping point from "I hope he hasn't got the wrong idea" to "OK, he hasn't taken the hint and now I'm scared/annoyed." Remember, when you send flowers to a workplace, not only does she see them, all her workmates do, and that's embarrassing if she has to answer repeated questions about who they're from with "Some guy I know. We're not serious." When you aren't a real couple, what you think is sweet, she might think is desperate.

It also can be misinterpreted as marking your territory. Ross sent Rachel all kinds of shit and he got his ass dumped.

I know my romance. I once left work two hours early so that when my mrs got home exhausted and drained from work expecting the usual dilemma of heading back out to get food or us ordering in a takeaway, she found a flat lit only by candlelight (every room) and a red hot bath with scented candles burning, her favourite soft jazz playing on an unobtrusive volume on the strategically placed dock and bubbles up to the brim, her gown and slippers laid out ready when she got out, to come and sit down to a candlelit three course meal of all her favourites and a bottle of certainly-not-cheap wine, and a different scent candle burning in the bedroom, next to her favourite aniseed massage bar and cocoa foot creme, to ease out any remaining tensions before sleepy-peeps. Just because. She loved a bit of romance. But she also hated over the top PDAs and would have throttled me if I'd sent anything to her work.

Not all women are the same. Some like their private life to be private, and while they like it if you let them know you're romantic and thinking about them, they'd be mortified if their whole office has to know too.

 

[Deepcover]

Your gf suffers from the Vietnam war syndrome...Cutting and running. Personally I think she found someone better and made a pathetic attempt to cut and run from what you felt was a good damn serious relationship. Some men and women do this type of thing bailing out with no clear explanation why. The way I see this is the heart wants what the heart wants...which typically fucking sucks thus that's just a part of life

Besides there is way more plenty of fish in the sea so, um, happy fishing

 

[Elwood70]

I've often said: I'll take a hard knee in the balls ten times over having my heart broken again.

I agree: It takes a lot less booze to drink the pain of a nut-shot away.

 

[Mr_Stiffy]

I agree: It takes a lot less booze to drink the pain of a nut-shot away.

Fuck me, I'll drink to that. :glugglug: It's 4AM here and I should be going to sleep, but I feel like getting up and having a drink.

 

[passenger57]

That feeling definitely sucks and most of us experienced it at least once. Once you start talking to someone else you'll be fine but until that happens, it's gonna hurt. And at a worst possible time yet with the holidays around the corner. No fun.

 

[Jack Davenport]

Ice. I assume you are in your 20's or 30's. This heartbreak shit will lose its sting the more it happens and obviously it hasn't happened much before in your life because you are talking about it here. It doesn't seem like it now but the day will come that you will wonder why in the fuck you ever were so tore up about this woman to start with. It may take 1, 2 or even 5 years but it will happen. Then you will enter the next relationship prepared for it and you will reach the point that I have where you trust no woman. Then and only then, will you free yourself from the power of the puss. There is nothing more satisfying than being able to walk away from a relationship when the bullshit starts. Robert Plant said it best. The soul of a woman was created below.

 

[sean miguel]

It doesn't seem like it now but the day will come that you will wonder why in the fuck you ever were so tore up about this woman to start with.

^ that.

I thought my heart was broken and it sucked at the time but in hindsight it wasn't love and I'm glad it happened because I ended up with the woman I was supposed to be with.