Supafly
Retired Mod
Here is a nice collection of hard to believe actual porn movie titles:
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GROSS - these are disgusting titles that should turn you off completely
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GROSS - these are disgusting titles that should turn you off completely
- THE ANAL GIRLS OF TOBACCO ROAD 2 : VAGINA SLIMES - The title that started me on this list. "Virginia Slims" becomes "Vagina Slimes" ? That's disgusting ! You get the idea.
- LET'S PLAY STAIN THE COUCH - And then invite all our friends over and watch them try to guess what that smell is !
- CRACK WHORES OF AMERICA - Because nothing turns a guy on more than needle tracks and missing teeth ...
- PRIME CUTS: YO QUIERO TACO SMELL - I know when I get down there, I want to smell refried beans !
- AMATEURS ONLY #129": I'M A BROWN SHIT-HOLED WHORE - Some people like poo, so maybe I shouldn't have included this one. What can I say, it just has a certain poetry to it.
- SEX STARVED FUCK SLUTS #22: STINKY WHITE WOMEN - Why would you want to have sex with somebody who is stinky ? You are a puzzle, sir.
- DUDE, WHERE'S MY DILDO ? - Bad movie, probably a bad porno based on a bad movie.
- ULTRA KINKY #79: BOWLIN' IN HER COLON - Bowling balls and colons, such a pretty image.
- ASS-HOLE O MIO - You've got to be kidding.
- HOMEGROWN VIDEO #489 : FUCK THE CANUCK - Trouble rhyming "bitch" today ?
- BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE VAGINA - Kurt Russell should be so lucky ...
- GOOD ASSTERNOON - I want to see a porno with really amazing dialogue. This won't be it.
- BACKDOOR ADVENTURES OF BUTTHEAD AND BEAVER - Too obvious.
- HINDFELD - A porno about nothing.
- TEA BAGGER VANCE - Did anybody see the original movie ? Yeah, whatever.
- MUSIC TO FUCK TO: ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES A LABIA - I would watch this if they actually got Lionel Richie to sing the new lyrics with a close-up shot of him crying.
- GERANALMO - Sure, why not ?
- BRASSIERE TO ETERNITY - You're reaching ...
- TIG OL' BITTIES - Spoonerisms can be fun. Sometimes not.
- MOULIN SPLOOGE - You saw this one coming ...
- TITS OF FURY - ... but not this one ...
- GERMAN WHORE FARE - Well, I groaned ...
- SHE'S NOT A LESBIAN ... SHE'S A VAGITARIAN - Sigh ...
- TOOKIE RAIDER - Tookie ? Tookie ??? You're just making up words now.
- MUFFUGNUGEN - That's just lame, man.
- PRIME CUTS: ONE FELL INTO THE POO-POO'S NEST - You went to college for this ?
- FILTHY FUCKERS #184: POKE 'ER MON - Who exactly is your target audience ?
- RIMMERAMA - It does kind of roll off the tongue, though.
- HOOTERS AND THE BLOWJOBS - Sometimes the music in porn movies is kind of interesting. Not this time.
- HUNG WANKENSTEIN - Two, count 'em, TWO bad puns in one title ! I want this job !
- SEX - This is so wonderfully descriptive, there are TWO movies with this title.
- THE SPLENDOR OF HELL - Nothing gets me going more than the thought of the sin I am committing at the time and the eventual suffering I am bringing upon myself.
- COCKLESS 19 - All-girl videos are okay if not kinda dull, but I get a sort of castration vibe from this one ...
- WET AND FROSTY - Are you talking about sex or beer ?
- WHY THINGS BURN - It's called a venereal disease ...
- AMATEURS ONLY #131: HOW MUCH LONGER IS THIS GOING TO TAKE - Guys love it when girls ask that question.
- BABY GIRL - A big disappointment for pedophiles.
- ANAL CHIROPRACTOR - What, in case your ass is out of alignment ? Yeesh.
- HUSH ! MY MOTHER MIGHT HEAR US ! - More of a turn-off for women viewers ...
- S.I.D.S.: SEXUALLY INTRUSIVE DYSFUNCTIONAL SOCIETY - Not Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, which always gets me hot.
- PRICE IS RIGHT - "Hey, let's name our new porn movie after a game show whose host wants to neuter your family dog !"
- SNOW WHITE AND THE THREE DWARFS - You're only calling attention to the fact that you're ripping us off to the tune of four dwarves.
- ABS OF CUM - That doesn't make any sense.
- DEAD MEN DON'T WEAR RUBBERS - You could get AIDS and DIE !!!
- SEX IN THE COMICS - This one actually looks pretty interesting. It's porn stars made up to look like cartoon characters having sex. Normal people probably don't want to see this, though ...
- TOPLESS BRAIN SURGEONS - No, I want you concentrating on my BRAIN during the operation ...
- YOUR QUIM IS MY GYM - Stupid, nonsensical, you are an object to be scorned.
- THEORY OF RELATIVITY - That Einstein, what a hottie.
- FELANALINGUS - "I made up a new word !" "Wow ! Let's hope it catches on !"
- K-FCK ... THE ONLY THING MISSING IS YOU ! - A five year old retard might think that was funny or clever, but only out of pity.
- BRIANNA LEE'S RED HOT WEINIE ROAST - Nobody is roasting my weinie. Go away.
- UNBALANCED CHEMICALS - Psychotics can be sexy too !
- STRAIGHT A STUDENTS - Why would I want to watch a porn movie where nobody gets to have sex ?
- LET'S PLAY ANAL TWISTER - That sounds somewhat painful. I'm glad you're not my friend.
- TUG BOAT - "Hello ? We make porno movies here. P-O-R-N-O. Do you understand ?"
- HEROIN - In answer to the question, what is wrong with the lead actress ?
- HAMLET : FOR THE LOVE OF OPHELIA #1 - Your average porn movie consumer will have no idea what this is a reference to.
- ACID SEX - It burns ! It burns !
- ADULT MOVIE (A.K.A. PORN MOVIE) - Whew, thank goodness. I didn't know what this was. I'm glad that's all cleared up.
- RI DICK U LOUS: CHOCOLATE CAN HARDLY HANDLE IT ! - When you named this movie, you were contemplating suicide, weren't you ? You should.
- FAT THE BALD AND THE UGLY - Well, at least they're accessible ...
- SANDWICH OF LOVE - Nobody ever got laid using this phrase. It's just not possible there's a woman this stupid out there.
- PERVERTED ADVENTURES OF SUPER DAVE #1 - It's a different Dave, not Super Dave Osbourne. But that's who you're thinking about right now, aren't you ? And is it turning you on ? Huh ?
- AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A FLEA - Yay ! My girlfriend is infested with tiny mites ! I am so happy !
- FRYSTIX - Who approved this ? Some porn producer who needed a tax shelter, that's who.
- ALL ANAL ON THE WESTERN FRONT - Not a good pun, not even a bad pun.
- HITLER SUCKS - Next time you have sex, when you're close to cumming, think of the Holocaust. Oh yeah, that's it.
- MASK - Not the movie with Cher and that weird-looking kid. But it might as well be.
- SKID ROW - Which mental image is worse, the worst section of town with all the drug dealers and hookers, or the band ?
- ANAL FIREBALL - Oh, ouch.
- AIRTIGHT GRANNY - What is an airtight granny ? Why is she airtight ? Is that a good thing or a bad thing ? I don't want to know !
- SECRETARIA EJECUTIVA #1: BROAD OF DIRECTORS - Ejecu-what ?
- SHRIMPIN' LOBSTER SAUCE - What does going to Sizzler have to do with porn ?
- A HORSE'S TAIL - It's not a bestiality video. If it was, it would be a good title. But it's not.
- E-THREE THE EXTRA TESTICLE - There is SO much wrong with this one ...
- SIRLOIN TITS - What were you thinking ? I'll bet there's an A-1 Sauce joke in there somewhere.
- BIG AS THIS BOX #1 - What exactly is "big as this box" ? And is it the same rough shape ... ?
- TITALLICA: MASTER OF PUPPIES - Puppies ? Puppies ?!!
- MEAT LOAF: TV DINNER BOX BIG, HUGE, MEATY COCKS - And I am out of the porn store like a bat out of hell ...
- ONION PLANET - I have no idea what this means. Something to do with onions, perhaps. And a planet.
- WHITE MEN CAN'T IRON ON BUTT ROW - Can't ... iron ? What about folding shirts ? Can white men do that ?
- SUPER DRIPPING WET SERIES #3: CARNAL CASSEROLE - Yum, reminds me of mom's !
- KID VEGAS WATCH ME CAMP BITCH ! - This one's actually about going camping. If I were a woman, yes, you would have to threaten me to get me to watch you camp.
- CLIMAX SHOTS #70: MY BROWN EYE, NOT THE WINKER, THE STINKER - Rhyming is fun. Hey, what rhymes with "loser" ?
- BUMPIN DONUTS - Uh, which body part is the donut again ?
- H.R. MUFF N' STUFF - Confusing childhood, was it ?
- AMBER THE LESBIAN QUEEFER - "Queefer" is just a funny word.
- MAY THE FORESKIN BE WITH YOU - Geek ! *cough cough*
- RED HOT CHO CHOS - I don't know what it means, but I heard some other kid on the playground use it ...
- WILLIE WANKER AND THE FUDGE PACKING FACTORY - Your fantasy life is sad.
- PRETTY LIL' SISTAS #1: BEAUTIFUL BLACK POPOZUDAS ! - Nobody talks like this. Nobody. I hope.
- BEEPING MISS BUFFY - Coyote's after you ...
- BACKDOOR LAMBADA - A taste for bad porn and horrifically out of date. Why hasn't some woman snapped you up yet ?
- WALL TO WALL #24: HELLO TITTY - "Good evening, sir. Ah, I see you have the erotic tastes of a young Japanese girl !"
- ACAPULCO #1: MALIBOOBIES - Hooters ! Headlights ! Ta-ta's ! Grow the fuck up !
- BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE ULTRA MILKMAIDS - Oh, let me guess -- this is an art film ?
- AFRO-CENTRIX #36: PUMPIN' THE PO-PO - Don't even try to tell me that's ebonics ...
- WHAT'S THE LESBIAN DOING IN MY PIRATE MOVIE ? - She's trying to earn enough to feed her crack habit.
- LUSTY LIFE #89: SLIDE YOUR LONG LOAF IN MY HOT OVEN - What ... what is wrong with you ?
- ADVENTURES OF THE FART BITCHES - Ha ha ha ha Fart Bitches.
