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John Cooper Clarke-Beasley Street

Once upon a time Jeff the horny bastard found a blue condom on the leather sofa that he used on his roomates for assfucking. Then Katy opens a can of huge beans that contained toxic

Forum members annoy me when they nit pick at other peoples grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. I suppose it makes them feel superior. Not talking about this forum, I must add!

My local Chinese takeaway,but I usually ring an order through,as I'm too lazy to walk there.

Metamorphosis

Dressing

Forrest Gump Braveheart Lock,Stock and Two Smoking Barrels To Die For Titanic Kramer vs. Kramer

E.G.Marshall-Creepshow

...but heres twenty pounds anyway Sunday is the day of rest....

ensnare

Bride of the *******

Got 10 years inside for misuse of an article of fast food as a childrens toy

..that I've never masturbated in my life I am prone to telling lies about myself but...

Bad-but both matches were abandoned due to pitch invasions by clowns and stoats respectivly Good- One of the clowns gave a superb rendition of Killer Queen in the middle of the pitch

Sophia Loren Jackie Stallone or Sylvester Stallone?

Stacey Keach-American History X am I playing this right?:confused:

...it just a circle in disguise I went to work dressed as Flaming Carrot yesterday and....

TPAM is about to use a Ham and Pineapple pizza as a frisbee,with disastrous results

The Best of The Skids

File On the Golden Goose

Attica

1 Sabretooth Tiger 1 litre of Hippopotomus semen-an excellent window cleaner 1 David Blunkett DIY Manual Eye of Newt and Brain of Toad 1 Brian Blessed Body Suit

Imagine Frank Zappa after sticking his finger in a socket, and your pretty near

Olives and Jeremy Kyle

I want my rep points back(throws toys out of pram). Actually, they were not that important were they, apart from giving some meaning to my sad, meaningless existence. I'll settle for a gold star or a pat on the back(puts toys back in pram reluctantly)

Solid Pleasure-Yello The Affectionate Punch-The Associates Client-Client Franz Ferdinand Real Life-Magazine

Robots in Disguise Westlife

20/20 for eveything. She's so hot

26, whatever that means

Both of them. I'm not renowned for my decision making. Two lovely pics though x

10 boxes of odour eaters half a can of lager 10 years subscription to Worm charmers weekly 1 packet of crushed Ginger Nuts One plastic frying pan

1. Doctor Who 2. As above, or maybe Flaming Carrot 3. Psychedelic Screwdriver 4. Anton Difference 5. Special Effects Supremo

I had a green stick fracture of my left arm. Fell off my bedroom door(???) when I was ten. I've got that to thank for being ambidextrous i.e writing with both hands

Julie Henderson is rather nice. Thanks LL x

I've never had a pet, apart from a certain rebellious slow worm that scared the **** out of my Australian ******. It was very naughty, always answering back and trying to escape

Re: I don't understand this question at all ... If you fall in love or lust with somebody, it does'nt matter if they have had 0 or 1000 previous lovers.

Well I consider Curb Your Enthusiasm to be the funniest comedy show ever so I think I can appreciate comedy from both sides of the water

Re: If you could forfeit your life to prevent 9/11 from ever happening, would you do I'm sorry but I voted no, on the basis that another similiar atrocity would probably have happened sooner or later so any altruistic action on my part would just be delaying the inevitable. Besides I've got too...

Roseanne Barr for me too. Well it could have been much worse i.e Jackie Stallone or Maggie Thatcher

Just two more Cabaret Voltaire-Microphonies + Frontline Assembly-Flavour of the Weak

or Revolting Cocks-Linger Fickin' Good

Yello-Flag

There are two very big reasons why Faith wins it for me

I'd like Russell Davies to spot me walking down the street and say "Stop right there we've found the new Doctor Who Failing that I would settle for being Avy Scott's personal pussy powderer

Anything with Billy Mackenzie singing on it, as although it is wonderful listening to it, you are constantly reminded that there will sadly be no more to come.

I have enough difficulty using a ***** and fork, so I'm living proof that Evolution hasn't really come on leaps and bounds. Seriously a question to those who don't believe that we(human kind) evolved from apes, then who or what exactly are our descendants/

Re: A perfect year for Ponting. Just wandering what any England(and Wales) Cricket supporters think of the teams chances in the World Cup. I think its a shame that there is a gap between the marvellous fightback and series win against the Aussies and the World Cup, as many of the team were...

Damn, I only reached the sixth level. Must try harder. I want to be at Beelzebub's right hand/claw

Got to say that there were some excellent Punk bands such as The Buzzcocks, and two that started as Punk and became more eclectic- Magazine and Wire. They all let their music do the talking.

Only Jade Goody could start a war with India. She's certainly in a class of her own.