Why do nice guys finish last? (A question for the ladies)

[CunningStunts]

Human nature.... especially with women, they want what they think they can't have... we all love the chase, but sometimes not so much the catch!

Also, "bad boys" are usually better in the sack

 

[maildude]

Also, "bad boys" are usually better in the sack

That's a crock of shit. Guys who are good in the sack learn to be good in the sack. It has nothing to do with being "bad." Well, unless by "bad" you mean "bad." By which I mean "bad" because you're "bad."

 

[Alyssa Rose]

well, in all honesty from a womans point of view, we grow up on the notion that 'bad boys' are sexy. In our minds if your a total douche its because your too cool to be anything else. It's kind of like how society has molded (most*) mens minds into thinking that beautiful or pretty or sexy is 5'11" 105 pounds with blonde hair and no brains. Though just like I said most men, there are also the girls out there who aren't totally turned on by bad boys. I'm not gonna lie, when I first met my husband in high school I was a blonde cheerleader and capt. of the volleyball team (I was also dating the star of the basketball team) but when I first saw my husband he had long black hair wore all black clothes (for the most part) and drove a thunderbird, he was pretty much the definition of bad boy (at least to the 15 year old me he was). I left my basketball boyfriend (though not without consequence, I was kicked off the cheerleading team because 'some of the people I associate with are not up to 'cheer' standards of whats acceptable.) and well the rest is history. Okay I rambled way more then I intended to, bottom line, don't ever be a door mat. Girls can be nasty and mean and hurt 'nice guys' if theres a girl and you really like her but she keeps falling for these 'bad boys' grab her by the shoulders, tell her how you feel but then say, "I can't wait forever." Leave and don't call her, don't text her don't stand outside her window in the bushes, wait. Set a time with yourself, a week 2 weeks a month (I wouldn't go longer than 2 months because though us women can be indecisive we pretty much know what we want after two months) and if after that time you've given her she hasn't showed up at your door ready to make nice, forget her and move on, she wasn't worth your time in the first place. Anyways, I hope I made sense Good luck!

 

[mrtrebus]

Also, "bad boys" are usually better in the sack

If nice guys 'finish' last then surely they're better in the sack than bad boys, who I assume 'finish' first?!?

 

[D-rock]

I'm not a woman, but just from some observations it's not that all women like jerks above nice guys. I think everything else being equal most women would pick the nice guys. I think you hardly hear about complaints from nice guys that settle with a nice women, so it skews the perception. When there are people that are never heard from it's often the case that they aren't thought of.

Often however, everything else isn't equal. When a lot of the nice guys that get rejected over somebody that's a jerk ask something like this it's often the case it wasn't the fact the were nice guys as much as other things. I not saying anything about any specific incidence here, but if a nice guy is a slob, poor, doesn't have a nice body, is ugly, or has some other flaw then that's going to effect them just like anybody else. I guess when it comes down to it there are women out there that are willing to put up with a jerk if he has money or is good looking or has something else going for them over a nice guy that doesn't have any of those things. Lets be honest with ourselves here. If a women had all those negative traits yet was a nice girl how many men still wouldn't want to have a relationship with her,....be honest? A lot of men will go out with total bitches because they are hot or have money so it's not just women out there that act like that.

I also suppose there really are women out there that for some stupid reason or another like the jerks. I don't think most woman are like that, but for the ones that are there is nothing you can do about it.

 

[Babyarm]

Women who like "bad boys" have issues, usually going back to childhood. Either no father figure, or if there was a male presence, he was probally abusive. They think that's how relationships are supposed to be. "Good" , or "nice" guys are foreign to them. Some ladies love drama, again, that goes back to the early stages of life... Like anomaly said, I'm not talking about door mats. That's unattractive for either sex. JMO...

 

[maildude]

Women who like "bad boys" have issues, usually going back to childhood. Either no father figure, or if there was a male presence, he was probally abusive. They think that's how relationships are supposed to be. "Good" , or "nice" guys are foreign to them. Some ladies love drama, again, that goes back to the early stages of life... Like anomaly said, I'm not talking about door mats. That's unattractive for either sex. JMO...

You are damned close to the truth.

 

[Babyarm]

Thank you sir. Trust me, I do have first hand experience. I've had girlfriends where I was the "good" guy. After we broke up, they kept going back to the asshole types, over & over. I used to think I was doing something wrong. Not so much...

 

[L3ggy]

I'd definately finish last, for I am super shy, I even rarely talk to my family, I prefer to spend my time with my cats.

 

[STDiva]

I even rarely talk to my family, I prefer to spend my time with my cats.

We'd get along.

 

[drf]

well, in all honesty from a womans point of view, we grow up on the notion that 'bad boys' are sexy. In our minds if your a total douche its because your too cool to be anything else. It's kind of like how society has molded (most*) mens minds into thinking that beautiful or pretty or sexy is 5'11" 105 pounds with blonde hair and no brains. Though just like I said most men, there are also the girls out there who aren't totally turned on by bad boys. I'm not gonna lie, when I first met my husband in high school I was a blonde cheerleader and capt. of the volleyball team (I was also dating the star of the basketball team) but when I first saw my husband he had long black hair wore all black clothes (for the most part) and drove a thunderbird, he was pretty much the definition of bad boy (at least to the 15 year old me he was). I left my basketball boyfriend (though not without consequence, I was kicked off the cheerleading team because 'some of the people I associate with are not up to 'cheer' standards of whats acceptable.) and well the rest is history. Okay I rambled way more then I intended to, bottom line, don't ever be a door mat. Girls can be nasty and mean and hurt 'nice guys' if theres a girl and you really like her but she keeps falling for these 'bad boys' grab her by the shoulders, tell her how you feel but then say, "I can't wait forever." Leave and don't call her, don't text her don't stand outside her window in the bushes, wait. Set a time with yourself, a week 2 weeks a month (I wouldn't go longer than 2 months because though us women can be indecisive we pretty much know what we want after two months) and if after that time you've given her she hasn't showed up at your door ready to make nice, forget her and move on, she wasn't worth your time in the first place. Anyways, I hope I made sense Good luck!

Thanks so much. This is what I was looking for.I needed a girl's point of view. For years I've convinced myself that a girl wouldn't be interested in me, so I resigned myself to the surrogate brother role with most of my female friends. I have had enough of being a sexless entity to them.
I know this much; one of the worst things a girl can say to a guy is "Your like my brother." I have heard that countless times and it never fails to make me feel like a sorry-ass chump.
But I digress. Girls are the entire reason we are on this planet and without them us men would be nothing. Life is too short to be alone and I need to man up and tell this girl how I feel. If she rejects me, to hell with her because it's her loss. At this point in my life rejection can't be any worse then being her "brother".

Thanks again hisss, you made perfect sense.

 

[Spleen]

You can not ask a girl this, because they will always say they want a "nice guy". Which isn't true.

 

[L3ggy]

Go for it!

 

[Alyssa Rose]

Thanks so much. This is what I was looking for.I needed a girl's point of view. For years I've convinced myself that a girl wouldn't be interested in me, so I resigned myself to the surrogate brother role with most of my female friends. I have had enough of being a sexless entity to them.
I know this much; one of the worst things a girl can say to a guy is "Your like my brother." I have heard that countless times and it never fails to make me feel like a sorry-ass chump.
But I digress. Girls are the entire reason we are on this planet and without them us men would be nothing. Life is too short to be alone and I need to man up and tell this girl how I feel. If she rejects me, to hell with her because it's her loss. At this point in my life rejection can't be any worse then being her "brother".

Thanks again hisss, you made perfect sense.

No problem and Good Luck! just remember don't give in and talk to her while shes making up her mind, she needs to know your serious. It'll all turn out good Oh and for the record I have to disagree with babyarm about how all girls who like badboys had some kind of 'father' problem because honestly thats like saying all guys who like women with long legs and big boobs were some how traumatized by their moms. 'Bad Boys' is a type of guy to us, like a brunette is to you guys.

 

[prof_porn]

Well, being a nice guy, I am coming to terms with the fact that I am never going to score again. College was a fantasy land [I wasnt F-16 like with my score, but you know] and since then I am in the freaking Sahara, and not in Sahara.

 

[power-san]

Girls like confidence.
Your salary reflects how hot your girl is.

 

[PlasmaTwa2]

You can not ask a girl this, because they will always say they want a "nice guy". Which isn't true.

Bingo. :hatsoff:

 

[mickeit]

Simple answer, most females do not have functional brains. If they did they would go for the nice guy that would treat them right.

Instead they are left usually holding the child or two. :hatsoff:

Men do not have functional brains too, as a matter of fact is Men don't like overly needy women and women don't like overly needy men.:fight:

 

[prof_porn]

Girls like confidence.
Your salary reflects how hot your girl is.

Broadly true, but you sometimes see gorgeous girls with broke ass fools.

 

[Jane Burgess]

You can not ask a girl this, because they will always say they want a "nice guy". Which isn't true.

Not true for all of us. I have always dated the "nice guys" and always will.