I bet this one has been done many times before but i'm doing it again! Hear us out.. Me and my girlfriend watch porn together to get in the mood sometimes and find some things in porn to be annoying or would love to know why certain things are done the way they are.
just to get in our 2 cents and let the industry people who may see this get our unbiased opinion about their work. Plus get a good conversation going.
Here goes in no particular order...
Lesbian porn that is all toy play: Toys are good. Toy are great, actually. But I thought lesbian porn was about girls licking and touching and rubbing and nipple sucking. Getting each other off with nothing but what god gave them to do so. Am I right? So what is up with the vibrators and the always present double ended dildo or strap on? Why do they whip it right out after barely touching and rubbing? Why do they perform oral on it for sooo long? Its a plastic penis! Lube that sucker and get on with it! It is as if the site just got two friendly girls to do a scene weather they are into really going for it or not, or are even lesbians. "All you have to do is take each other clothes off and then do a toy.. badda boom badda bing.. ka-ching!" It feels boring and stiff to see gilr simply getting off with a toy like they would with a male performer.
When the guy does all the sex talk!: I'm not gay.. the dudes cheesy sex talk ruins the scene for me.. but even for my lover? jeez.. I wanna hear the girl! And if it is to make up for the girl being quiet, then that's stupid. The quiet slight moans and heavy breathing make that stuff sexy! There might not need to be sex talk. Plus maybe she's not even getting off. All the sex talk from the male and quick edits to mild orgasms won't make up for a dud scene.
When the guy(male performer) in a scene makes goofy sex faces and has to have his face in every scene/shot: I know there are a lot of sex positions where the guy's face is RIGHT THERE, ya know? Kissing the girl's neck, licking her nipples. everything sensual and sexy. But I don't want to see the girl contort her body in reverse cowboy, etc. or other positions where the guy's face would be hidden, just so we get an eyeful of his ugly mug making a ridiculous face! Especially in close up shots!
The same tired order of thingsin every scene on every site.. kissing, to undressing, her giving oral, then receiving it from him, to sex laying down, then reverse cowboy, then cowboy, then a more yoga like position to the last big O, then pull out and bam! facial!:
Why don't they ever mix it up? Why is almost always in the same order? There is variety, but all too often it follows this formula. Plus me and my girl never do it like this ourselves. No one does! Why can't it ever be more natural? More laying down and kissing, full throttle passionate groping? Slowly undressing and caressing? A site that made this their specialty would kick ass! Plus get us off so freakin good, we'd be doing it ourselves in matter of minutes!
Pornstars in a scene trying to pass themselves off as younger for the premise of the scene: You know what i'm talking about! The eighteen year old sites where half the girls could be in their late twenties of thirties! The naughty schoolgirl deals where the girl also just did a naughty office scene or whatever. Most of the time we don't care, its just part of the way it is. The site like to use their talent as much as possible. Its just that when a girl or the guy is so obviously older than the person he is playing. A ripped tattooed muscle bound, five o' clock shadow faced high school teenager? A wrinkly, large fake breasted, pierced, heavily made up young innocent virgin schoolgirl? You may disagree but we find it ruins the premise a bit when it is less than believable.
Sites that boost their pic count with too many shots of the same pose:
Clicking ten shots of the same pose minus a finger moving or eye closing here or there is not cool. one or two of the best of that pose would suffice. If we have to click though nine pages before she even lifts her shirt is nuts! I don't care if you have nine million pictures! I bet 8,999,999 of those are duplicate shots! We aren't stupid. Be honest. Don't decieve us with multiple shots!
And finally:
When your favorite pornstar looks amazing in scene,is all made up just right, is so beautiful and perfect, but it's FOOT FETISH PORN and all you get to see is her feet!:
A headshot here, and a requisite breast shot here, then all feet! How many people are into this? And why oh why do our faves not get this glam for a regular hardcore scene? Why do they have to look so amazing just to have their face bypassed for their feet? Are we the only ones who notice this? This could go for any type of extreme fetish porn. Mask wearing latex fetish, etc.. where we see their face then it's hidden of not shown, but for the brief second or single shot she looks heavenly!
just to get in our 2 cents and let the industry people who may see this get our unbiased opinion about their work. Plus get a good conversation going.
Here goes in no particular order...
Lesbian porn that is all toy play: Toys are good. Toy are great, actually. But I thought lesbian porn was about girls licking and touching and rubbing and nipple sucking. Getting each other off with nothing but what god gave them to do so. Am I right? So what is up with the vibrators and the always present double ended dildo or strap on? Why do they whip it right out after barely touching and rubbing? Why do they perform oral on it for sooo long? Its a plastic penis! Lube that sucker and get on with it! It is as if the site just got two friendly girls to do a scene weather they are into really going for it or not, or are even lesbians. "All you have to do is take each other clothes off and then do a toy.. badda boom badda bing.. ka-ching!" It feels boring and stiff to see gilr simply getting off with a toy like they would with a male performer.
When the guy does all the sex talk!: I'm not gay.. the dudes cheesy sex talk ruins the scene for me.. but even for my lover? jeez.. I wanna hear the girl! And if it is to make up for the girl being quiet, then that's stupid. The quiet slight moans and heavy breathing make that stuff sexy! There might not need to be sex talk. Plus maybe she's not even getting off. All the sex talk from the male and quick edits to mild orgasms won't make up for a dud scene.
When the guy(male performer) in a scene makes goofy sex faces and has to have his face in every scene/shot: I know there are a lot of sex positions where the guy's face is RIGHT THERE, ya know? Kissing the girl's neck, licking her nipples. everything sensual and sexy. But I don't want to see the girl contort her body in reverse cowboy, etc. or other positions where the guy's face would be hidden, just so we get an eyeful of his ugly mug making a ridiculous face! Especially in close up shots!
The same tired order of thingsin every scene on every site.. kissing, to undressing, her giving oral, then receiving it from him, to sex laying down, then reverse cowboy, then cowboy, then a more yoga like position to the last big O, then pull out and bam! facial!:
Why don't they ever mix it up? Why is almost always in the same order? There is variety, but all too often it follows this formula. Plus me and my girl never do it like this ourselves. No one does! Why can't it ever be more natural? More laying down and kissing, full throttle passionate groping? Slowly undressing and caressing? A site that made this their specialty would kick ass! Plus get us off so freakin good, we'd be doing it ourselves in matter of minutes!
Pornstars in a scene trying to pass themselves off as younger for the premise of the scene: You know what i'm talking about! The eighteen year old sites where half the girls could be in their late twenties of thirties! The naughty schoolgirl deals where the girl also just did a naughty office scene or whatever. Most of the time we don't care, its just part of the way it is. The site like to use their talent as much as possible. Its just that when a girl or the guy is so obviously older than the person he is playing. A ripped tattooed muscle bound, five o' clock shadow faced high school teenager? A wrinkly, large fake breasted, pierced, heavily made up young innocent virgin schoolgirl? You may disagree but we find it ruins the premise a bit when it is less than believable.
Sites that boost their pic count with too many shots of the same pose:
Clicking ten shots of the same pose minus a finger moving or eye closing here or there is not cool. one or two of the best of that pose would suffice. If we have to click though nine pages before she even lifts her shirt is nuts! I don't care if you have nine million pictures! I bet 8,999,999 of those are duplicate shots! We aren't stupid. Be honest. Don't decieve us with multiple shots!
And finally:
When your favorite pornstar looks amazing in scene,is all made up just right, is so beautiful and perfect, but it's FOOT FETISH PORN and all you get to see is her feet!:
A headshot here, and a requisite breast shot here, then all feet! How many people are into this? And why oh why do our faves not get this glam for a regular hardcore scene? Why do they have to look so amazing just to have their face bypassed for their feet? Are we the only ones who notice this? This could go for any type of extreme fetish porn. Mask wearing latex fetish, etc.. where we see their face then it's hidden of not shown, but for the brief second or single shot she looks heavenly!
