--At lunch, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
--Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
--Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
--Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'in'.
--Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
--In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds".
--Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy".
--Don't use punctuation
--As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
--Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
--Sepcify that your drive thru order is to go.
--Sing along at the opera.
--Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
--Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
--Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
--Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.
-- Get on the elevator & insist that everyone call you "Admiral."
--When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won, I won!"
--When leaving the ***, start running towards the parking lot, yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!"
--Tell your ******** over dinner, "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go".
