Random Statement Thread II

[Bonezstorm]

Who is your daddy and what does he do?

 

[Supafly]

My daddy worked for the administration of the northern state of Germany, Schleswig-Holstein, the section handling all things cultural.

Are you into watching F1 and DTM?

 

[The Yak]

The coffee tastes like somebody came in it.

 

[Supafly]

Coffee! A great idea.

 

[The Yak]

A group of us at work paid a large, black man to chase our boss around the office while shouting "WHAT IS LIKE TO HAVE A SMALL PENIS?!!". Upon catching our boss, the large black man took him to a conference room which we had reserved and our boss was not allowed to leave until he had spoken for 30 minutes about having a small penis. He said that having a small penis once taught him the true meaning of Christmas after he exposed himself to a woman breastfeeding in a laundromat. He didn't go until further detail because the police arrived at that point. I've always wondered about that story.

 

[Bonezstorm]

Are you into watching F1 and DTM?

I have an F1-button on my keyboard

 

[Supafly]

My fave news story of late

Mosh pit nappy, designed to avoid queues at gig loos, sells out​

The black pleather accessory includes metal studs and chains and prevents bathroom breaks from spoiling a concert.

An adult incontinence nappy, designed for concertgoers to avoid long queues at toilets, has gone on sale.

The limited-editon Pit Diaper, specifically for Mosh pits at music gigs, was available for $75 (£59) before selling out.



It was sold by US firm Liquid Death, a sparkling water brand known for its unusual heavy metal-style images and marketing.

The firm's promotional material said: "If you've been to a concert, you know the scariest place isn't the Mosh pit. It's the bathroom.

...

https://news.sky.com/story/mosh-pit-diaper-designed-to-avoid-lines-at-loos-sells-out-13275899

 

[The Yak]

Whenever someone says that it should always be remembered that porn is a fantasy, I am reminded of a scene from Kink.com's Whipped Ass channel in which Gia Dimarco spits in Shay Fox's face. Ms. Fox appears perturbed by this but does not say anything (or it was edited out) because she is at work. In 99.9% of other workplaces, spitting on a person would be a much bigger issue and would not be followed by acrobatic strap-on sex.

 

[Supafly]

In 15 days, FGermany elects a new federal government. The former 3-party-coalition of SPD, Grüne and FDP split up

 

[The Yak]

This summer, I plan to travel to the lymph nodes and cause symptoms that mimic an allergic reaction, including swelling of the larynx, airway blockage, cardiac distress and shortness of breath.