Dear Bennihanna

[bennihanna]

i hope this isnt against the rules but, i figured just for fun since being a proud member here for a while id like to interact more with the other members here so the point of this is simple, kinda like-a Dear Annie kinda thing but....about porn! genius right? so i guess if youd like to for whatever reason in a friendly way just talk about your favorite ladies, my favorite ladies what kinda stuff you like id be more than happy to help you find links and share links with you folks. (share links that follow the rules of freeones of course ) so give me a "dear bennihanna" preferably via Private Message but if youd like go ahead and ask me something here on the thread.

your pal,
Bennihanna:glugglug:

 

[Torre82]

:looks at your location: Italia:

Hm.

::looks at your post count: 871::

Hrrr... hmm...

::starts typing::

itsa me, mario! heh.heh..ahem, sorry. So.. my favorite ladies? My ex. My ex before her. Not my ex before her. Or was that after? I forget. I think it was before, though. Barb was a friggin' minx in bed. Rode the cock like a pro. Mary-Kay, not at all. She layed there and never gave any obvious or subtle indications she was cumming or even enjoying it. I dont believe she was relaxed in the least while cheating with me. :shrug:

Anyway, on-topic: Call me crazy but I want to bareback Jenna Jameson. Jada Fire. Asia Carrera, Kobe Tai, JENTEAL!..ehh.. who else.. Anna Malle, Anna Nicole Smith, Nicole Kidman, Catherine Zeta Jones during one of two movies.. the first zorro, or Chicago. Maybe during that flick where she steals stuff. I dunno, I'm just pointing out holes I'd like to be inside of at that point in time. The 90s.

 

[maildude]

Dear Bennihanna:

My electricity went off last night and I want to **** somebody. Any suggestions?

--Malicious In Michigan

 

[bennihanna]

Torre
i hope you kept barbs number for a bootycall

and i can definitly picture all those lovely ladies in the fine old fashioned lingerie
http://galleries.spicydreamz.com/As...ts=askjolene:SpicyDreamZ:SpicyDreamZ,0,0,0,98

http://gals.sunnysgirlfriends.com/fhg/hg090/01/?nats=askjolene:SunnysMoney:SG,0,0,0,3051

http://mypetjawa.mu.nu/archives/ann_nicole_smith_lingerie.jpg
http://stylefrizz.com/img/nicole-kidman-australia-harpers-bazaar.jpg

and i gotta say i loved when kobe and jenna worked together
http://www.hpornstars.com/tgp/jennalez/ablog171a.htm

 

[bennihanna]

dear malacious:

instead of taking it out by ********* someone i suggest going to the bathroom and finding your favorite porno mag and letter rip itll remind you of how folks used to do it before the amazing internet came along

 

[ChefChiTown]

Dear Bennihanna,

I have this mysteriously reappearing rash on the tip of my penis. It comes and goes, maybe every other week or so. I first noticed it after I masturbated with Louisiana hot sauce covered gardening gloves one time, and ever since then, it's been a festering curse that has plagued my male genitalia. I'm not sure if there's a connection, but, you never know. Anyway, my penis burns like it's just been stung by a thousand bees that have molten hot stingers. You know that expression, "a baby's arm holding an apple?" Well, that's what my penis actually looks like right now because my "apple" is the same color as Rudolph's schnoz. It's all blistery and scab ridden too, like a prostitutes asshole. I've tried all sorts of ointments and topical creams, but I find myself aroused when applying such remedies, only to come to masturbate when I rub the creamy goodness all over my junk. I am in dire need of some help. Please, save my little soldier. He's ready to re-enlist, Sir.

Sincerely,

Burning Mushroom Cap

PS - My semen has also been slowly turning a light periwinkle color, if that helps. I just uh, I just wanted to throw that out there.

 

[bennihanna]

dear burning,
i am no doctor but you should really get that check out ASAP for the good of yourself and who ever else is friends with your "little soldier" and after you get your situation fixed up maybe you can have a crank to this
http://www.nastygodcash.com/gal/200/10/404-h/186/index.html

 

[DOA82]

So, we submit a problem, query, question, parable or general musing? You throw back advice a 5 year old could type and give us some porn for our troubles?

 

[Spleen]

Dear Bennihanna,

If you're dick falls off and grows back, and then falls off again and then grows back... Are you really unlucky or really unlucky?

Yours truely,
Spleen McSpleenerson

 

[Torre82]

Dear Benjamin Hanna,

Should I wank off, then *****? Or wank.. *****.. ***** more.. then hope my dick works well enough to wank again while ***********?

I mean.. wanking, ********.. they're all mandatory parts of my day. I just wonder what your advice on the ratio is. Btw, I love nipples.. big, sexcellent nipples on round tits.. BUT NOT PORNSTARS! Amateurs, preferably. Someone who enjoys it and isnt jaded by a paycheck from hustler or the like. Please help me as best you can.

 

[bennihanna]

So, we submit a problem, query, question, parable or general musing? You throw back advice a 5 year old could type and give us some porn for our troubles?

not so much a problem more of a quesion or general musing, and yes absolutaly im not trying to be senimental here

 

[bennihanna]

Dear Bennihanna,

If you're dick falls off and grows back, and then falls off again and then grows back... Are you really unlucky or really unlucky?

Yours truely,
Spleen McSpleenerson

really........lucky

 

[don_equis]

Estimado(a) Bennihanna:

Si ordeno una pizza y no llega en 15 minutos, entonces pago o no pago por la pizza?

 

[bennihanna]

Dear Benjamin Hanna,

Should I wank off, then *****? Or wank.. *****.. ***** more.. then hope my dick works well enough to wank again while ***********?

I mean.. wanking, ********.. they're all mandatory parts of my day. I just wonder what your advice on the ratio is. Btw, I love nipples.. big, sexcellent nipples on round tits.. BUT NOT PORNSTARS! Amateurs, preferably. Someone who enjoys it and isnt jaded by a paycheck from hustler or the like. Please help me as best you can.

wank than *****, its a celebration than give'r another shot while under the influence. just make sure your not in a public place
http://slutgfs.com/galleries/2008/9/horny-gfs-nextdoor/index.php?ccbill=1783455

http://www.busty-cafe.com/coco/bigtitsaaj.html

http://dirtypreview.com/nah/34/01/pichunter.html

http://www.exhibgals.com/pld/bbb28/krawl.html

 

[BananaPalmer]

Dear Benni, my wife has a temper like a bag of old dynamite, the slightest thing will set her off, and she put it to good use yesterday when she came home unexpectedly and caught me fucking our enormously-titted neighbour. Do you have any tips on how to mend a broken todger?
Oglero :eek:

 

[bennihanna]

Estimado(a) Bennihanna:

Si ordeno una pizza y no llega en 15 minutos, entonces pago o no pago por la pizza?

hmmm this is a tough one, the pizza should get there in 30 min, if its not there in 30 min dont pay. if it gets there in 15 thats pretty impressive from where i live. just get get stuck with a pizza with a hole in it and a creepy delivery guy
http://www.reality-gals.com/bsp/406t/index21.html


http://www.reality-gals.com/bsp/415m/index21.html

http://kokine.com/realitycash2/bigsausagepizza/54/ph.html

 

[bennihanna]

Dear Benni, my wife come home unexpectedly and caught me fucking our enormously-titted neighbour. Do you have any tips on how to mend a broken todger?
Oglero :eek:

put some dirt on it n get back in there champ

http://amanda.uberpron.com/Pics/080908/SexyJacky/

 

[ChefChiTown]

Dear Benni, my wife has a temper like a bag of old dynamite, the slightest thing will set her off, and she put it to good use yesterday when she came home unexpectedly and caught me fucking our enormously-titted neighbour. Do you have any tips on how to mend a broken todger?
Oglero :eek:

And see...this whole time I thought the saying was "hit the NAIL on the head."

 

[bennihanna]

that picture is just tragic

 

[don_equis]

Dear Bennihanna how do you cook the perfect steak and match it up with the perfect sauce?