My wife just had a surgery recently. Everything came out fine but the doctor told her no sex for three weeks. We are in the middle of our second and man we cant take it. Today during luch she told me she wants our friend to come over. Shes a divorcee and really has not gotten laid for three years. My wife said she wants me to fuck her at our house. I laughed it off, mainly because she is not like that and barely even tolerates me watching porn. But I noticed she was serious and I told her no. She kept insisting and I said why. She does not want me to cheat on her was her response. I told her thats cheating what she was asking of me. She still insists she wants to do her friend a favor because she wants to get back with her cheatin ex. I still said no. I assurred my wife Im not going to cheat on her. My dad cheated on my mom and I vowed not to be like him. But she insists on this. Shes going to the house tonight. Is it cheating if the wife is going to mildly participate and she approves it?
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Confused with wifeys offer...
- Thread starter southtxmordecai
- Start date
NOPE! If you're doing it together, I don't think it's cheating. I think it's cheating if you're doing it without her, or you don't want her to be there or don't even want her to know about it. I mean- she obviously WANTS you to do this, and if your wife is participating, then it's both of you having sex with someone additional.
Just keep in mind that although your wife can't fully participate, PAY ATTENTION TO HER! If she is very aware that you're keeping her in mind, she probably won't have any problems at all. My wife and I have participated in swinging and group sex activities for a while, and a key strategy to preventing misunderstanding and jealousy issues is to talk- before, during, after- and to make sure that you're paying attention to the one you have to live with for the rest of your life.
And have fun! Don't forget that part.
JW
Just keep in mind that although your wife can't fully participate, PAY ATTENTION TO HER! If she is very aware that you're keeping her in mind, she probably won't have any problems at all. My wife and I have participated in swinging and group sex activities for a while, and a key strategy to preventing misunderstanding and jealousy issues is to talk- before, during, after- and to make sure that you're paying attention to the one you have to live with for the rest of your life.
And have fun! Don't forget that part.
JW
Maybe its just me but something about this has "BAD IDEA" written all over it. If you're having doubts then maybe some small voice inside your head is saying its a bad idea as well, personally I listen to the voices in my head.
Good luck to you though on your choice.
Good luck to you though on your choice.
Death_blooms08 said:
Well, I gotta admit, DeathBlooms, I hadn't thought of that. I don't believe it's cheating if she's there, participating, and you're all having fun. But if there's doubt in your head, be careful there. Ask your wife if she'd still want to have fun with this friend and you when she's all better.
JW
Well I don't know South or his wife so my advice can only go so far. Swinging obviously isn't a relationship killer if couples like hedonis and his wife can do it. It's usually the persons personalty that makes something like so difficult. If South is afraid that this will lead to him cheating like his dad, not to be cliche but the first step is always the hardest, after you do it the first time it just gets easier and easier. Now if South's wife isn't a jealous person and South has self-control, then their is a possiblity it could work out, but me personally I usually go with my first instinct. Like I said before, good luck with your choice South, I can only imagine how difficult it is for you.
You sound too hesitant & unwilling to do this to go forward with it. To me it sound's like you're a pawn in a fucked up chess match with your wife's friend & her cheating husband. Not to mention the long term effect's this may have on your marriage after this 1 time trist. You really can't wait another week?
Thanks for the advice guys. I will test the mood first see how things go in my home. A guy that has not gotten laid in half a week tends not to think right. But since my wife was pretty serious about this I will listen. You bring up a good point when you say when the doctor clears her next week on friday if she will want to do this again. I forgot to say that this friend is a good friend of ours. And 30 minutes ago my wife called said she bought a porn film. I didnt think it was true until she sent me a pic on the phone of the cover. Oh well never had a threesome before. I will keep in mind what you said about me paying more attention to my wife than our friend. Well Ill tell you what happened when I get back to work tommorrow morning.
nina_hartley_fan
Banned
Mate if i was you i would look at your marriage and really see if having sex with another woman would improve ur marriage or destroy it, what happens if you have sex with this other woman and you really enjoy it so much you want more from her, this could lead you to cheat on ur wife with this woman, another thing is if your wife gets jealous during this she may use it against you i times to come,
I say wait the extra week and dont cheat on your wife, bringing other ppl into ur sex is a sure bet to screw up ya marriage and less its already on the rocks in which case maybe give it a go. It may make ur wife more horny for you!
I say wait the extra week and dont cheat on your wife, bringing other ppl into ur sex is a sure bet to screw up ya marriage and less its already on the rocks in which case maybe give it a go. It may make ur wife more horny for you!
The fact that she is usually not like this is the concern for me. I don't think she's been cheating on you... she might be genuinely concerned that You Might find another outlet. I don't beleive this is cheating, but I do agree with Death_bloom that this is a 'Bad Idea.' This will create a whole new dynamic to your relationship and seeing that she hasn't been up for things like this in the past, I would worry that it could very well come back to haunt you. 3 weeks isn't that long, and FREEONES has plenty of porn for you to releive yourself in the meantime!
Also, if she want to get you off, have her give you a handjob or blowjob... this will comfort her more without bringing a time-bomb into the relationship.
Just my thoughts on the subject!
Also, if she want to get you off, have her give you a handjob or blowjob... this will comfort her more without bringing a time-bomb into the relationship.
Just my thoughts on the subject!
Reminds me of the end of Chasing Amy ... for those who have seen the movie. I think all arguments brought up there can be applied.
member2686
Banned
3 weeks? That's it? Man that's pretty bad if you and your wife can't go 3 weeks without sex. If she's worried about satisfying you, is she off limits orally and by hand too? Someone else brought this up as well... I think something is afoul here and it smells like revenge and manipulation. I don't like it at all...
My vote is no, if you're still taking votes. lol Something stinks here, and it isn't athlete's foot. lol :2 cents:
My vote is no, if you're still taking votes. lol Something stinks here, and it isn't athlete's foot. lol :2 cents:
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this sounds like something out of penthouse...meanwhile, to each their own but...
things i don't understand:
why people can't parallel park
reality tv
WHY PEOPLE WANT THEIR SPOUSES TO FUCK/BE FUCKED BY SOMEONE ELSE
sorry...if/when i get married, i become off limits and so does my wife. marriage is hard enuf to make work without handing your husband/wife cheating material - yes, it's cheating. why get married in the first place?
case in point...friend of mine, high-skool buddy, brings a friend home for he and wifey to have 3-somes with...one day he finds out they're having 3-somes without him...sorry, but i had to call him stupid and he's since stopped talking to me (and his wife left him for the other guy).
tell your wife the best way to keep u from cheating is communication, not letting her husband screw one of her friends.
could u tell how i'm voting?
things i don't understand:
why people can't parallel park
reality tv
WHY PEOPLE WANT THEIR SPOUSES TO FUCK/BE FUCKED BY SOMEONE ELSE
sorry...if/when i get married, i become off limits and so does my wife. marriage is hard enuf to make work without handing your husband/wife cheating material - yes, it's cheating. why get married in the first place?
case in point...friend of mine, high-skool buddy, brings a friend home for he and wifey to have 3-somes with...one day he finds out they're having 3-somes without him...sorry, but i had to call him stupid and he's since stopped talking to me (and his wife left him for the other guy).
tell your wife the best way to keep u from cheating is communication, not letting her husband screw one of her friends.
could u tell how i'm voting?
Thanks for all your input, opinions and advice. Yesterday as when I got home from work they were both in the living room watching tv. I think I was the only confused one in the room because they were both chatting away and laughing (They were watching Elf). I also sat down to watch it but I sat on the floor with my back leaning on the couch below my wife. Half way into the movie my wife starts to rub her foot on my dick. Of course im going to react. Since im still with my scrubs you can really notice my erection. Through the corner of my eye I can see that our friend was paying attentiont to what she was doing. She keeps on messing with me till the movie is about to end. There was something about the whole situation that it started to feel right. My wife all of a sudden got up and went to the kitchen. Her friend followed. I was thinking not thinking much I just wanted some relief. My wife comes and says that she wants to watch another movie. Of course she puts on the porn. Right when it starts I take her to the bedroom. She has that smile across the face thinking im going to do something but I tell her if she really wants to go through with this. Without hesitating she says yes. I ask why all of a sudden she wants to do this. Of course I asked her if she has cheated on me and if it was her way of getting out of it. She says no. I can proudly say we have that relationship. I cant, seriously cant lie to her and she cant either. When she suspected me watching porn I told her the truth. Its a long story but the point is I trust her with my life. And I told her with us doing this I did not want to ruin it. She kissed me and said its all good and lets have a little fun. It felt right so we went back to the living room. I sat down to watch the movie. It was in the scene where Miko lee and lezely zen are in a threesome with some guy as nurses. I didnt know if I sould make the first move but right away my wife answered my thought by taking down my pant scrub and giving me head. Our friend looked and quickly came over and knelt next to my wife. I was really surprised that I was the only one holding back. I did notice that my wife did not want to tuch her though. When she started to blow me my wife started kissing my stomach and chest and had me suck her tits. IT WAS AWESOME. I followed the advise as to just pay attention to my wife and fuck her. It definatley worked. Our friend had a nice cunt very well shaven and bigger tits than my wife. I made sure to pay attention more to my wifes tits though. I would go into more detail but this post is too long already. In the morning the three of us took a shower together and went to work. We had lunch together a while ago and it was all laughs like nothing was in the way. So far no regrets.
member2686
Banned
I don't suspect you ever really wanted our advice anyway. You knew you were going to do it and you've now had your chance to share your story. I hope it was/is worth it!
Your wife must think she has pretty lame blowjob skills that she was worried you'd stray from her after three weeks of no intercourse. Hell, I could LIVE on my exes' oral skills alone. They've been AMAZING in that regard!!!
There's something much more to this than you're either telling or than your wife is telling you. I suspect you've been played and perhaps it's really more about your wife introducing you into her heretofore "secret" world of swinging or partner swapping.
There are many layers to this onion, IMO. :2 cents:
Your wife must think she has pretty lame blowjob skills that she was worried you'd stray from her after three weeks of no intercourse. Hell, I could LIVE on my exes' oral skills alone. They've been AMAZING in that regard!!!
There's something much more to this than you're either telling or than your wife is telling you. I suspect you've been played and perhaps it's really more about your wife introducing you into her heretofore "secret" world of swinging or partner swapping.
There are many layers to this onion, IMO. :2 cents:
No trust me my wifes skills are all that. Im really not being to specific. We got married last October but we have been together 8 years now. Our sex life is awesome. Before we got married we would fuck anywhere there was a good empty spot. Her parents are very VERY into their church. They are very strict. Well I had enough money to pay for our wedding and honeymoon but not to start my house. So we lived in her parents house until last week when I finished building my house. My sex drive went a little down because I could not fuck her the same with her parents across the hall. Even now, we moved in last tuesday and they come over uninvited. But its frustrating moving into my home and not being able to fuck. Thats what frustrates us. Her oral skills are awesome but fucking at her parents house for 11 months is very frustrating. With her parents making sure we hear them outside and sending the little sister, while im in the middle of things, knocking at our door. I took everyones advice and thought it over to myself. So far, so far everything is alright. Plus now I get to watch porn on the big screen and buy movies.
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