Ace Boobtoucher
Founder and Captain of the Douchepatrol
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Shaffer told Fox News he has confirmed that the investigation concluded that Bergdahl's key ********* was desertion, and that he will face a military court martial.
"This has been done. The decision has been made," Schaffer said. "Let me be very clear. As a corporate entity, the Army has decided that they want to pursue Bergdahl for this *********."
But, Schaffer said, the White House is attempting to keep the information from being made public because it would embarrass Obama, who brought Bergdahl's parents to the White House for a Rose Garden announcement of the release.